I do sympathise - rational arguments do nothing to help phobias, which are, by definition, irrational!
Where ever possible, ignore spiders. They don;t stay in one place long, and at this time of year, they are looking for mates, so they are travelling almost constantly.
Deterring them is really difficult, they are most resourceful, being able to survive without food or water for a long time.
The good news is - they will avoid you when possible, so forget any ideas of them crawling on you in bed. The myth that adults swallow eight spiders in a lifetime is just that - a myth put out in the early days of the Web (no pun intended!) to see how it would get around - which of course it has.
If you see one, talke some deep breaths, and try to ignore it. move to another room if possible. Sit with your feet up, and as i say, just try and ignore them. They will avoid you if possible, so hopefully this advice may help.