Loose women...

[ummmm]

Talking about parenting.

Are you mates with your kids? Or are you the parent?

I'm definitely the parent.

[LoftyLottie]

I never used bad language in front of my parents and my son never does in front of me. On the very rare occasion that he has he has apologised.

[andy-hughes]

I think a parent-child relationship is unique - friendship is not.

I have always guided my girls, and given them advice, and I still do, even though they are all adults now.

Growing up, we never swore in front of each other - my eldest daughter was 28 before i heard her swear, and that was under severe provocation (not by me!).

I am very close to my daughters, but I am not, and cannot be their friend, and especially not their 'mate' - our relationship is special and i would not want it lumped in with everyone else they know.

[madmaggot]

You're right Andy, my daughter will come to me to talk about anything at all, she knows that I will give the best advice that I can and act in her interests not my own.
Likewise I can be honestly critical of her in a way that 'friends' cannot without falling out because there is unconditional love between us.

[murraymints]

well done to you Andy Hughes ... you sound like my dad. although I am now wrong side of 50, we have a great friendly relationship great banter etc but he will ALWAYS be dad and his word is so respected and valued even now.

[LoftyLottie]

I think you are right Andy. You can't define a parent/child relationship. It's totally different. And I think, as you imply, that being a friend is not the same as being a mate, which is what I tried not very successfully to say earlier in this thread.

But every parent/child relationship is different and what is acceptable for some wouldn't be acceptable to others. For example, we discussed most things in front of our child, including family problems and finances, relationships, etc. Some people would find this to be unnacceptable but it worked for us. We never had to resort to a great deal of disciplinary action because we all understood each other very well.

[ummmm]

My parents told me everything as well....not 'discussed' as they split up when I was eight. They never slagged each other off though. Dad always told me how much he loved her and what a great Mum she was.....

When my Grandad moved to England (Dad's Dad) he came to live with us (my Mum and Sister) He had 7 kids of his own in town...but wanted to live with us, My Dads ex Wife. That says alot for my Mum I think..

[murraymints]

I STILL STAYED FRIENDS WITH MY EX'S DAD UMMMM... NOT HIS FAULTT HIS SON WAS AN IDIOT !!!

[ummmm]

The whole family stayed friends after they split. The divorce, in hindsight, was the best thing that ever happened. My Dad turned into a brilliant Dad...

[murraymints]

sounds like you have an ace family ummmmmm !

[ummmm]

They're pretty cool....one of my best friends is my Uncle and two of my cousins.

[murraymints]

to be syr to be sure surely butch? begorra bejabers.....

[ummmm]

They are all Irish Butch.....