Self-help book on accepting your parents don't love you

[CAJ1]

Hi,

Can anyone recommend a book that will help you overcome the fact that your mother does not want/love you. I don't want one on abuse, just one that sort of directs you on how to deal with not being loved.

Thanks

[sandyRoe]

Healing the shame that binds you. John Bradshaw.
It's not specifically about the situation you describe, but it could be just what you need.

[CAJ1]

Thanks SandyRoe, will give it a try

[CAJ1]

Found this book too, I think it might help - Healing From Family Rifts: Ten Steps to Finding Peace After Being Cut Off From a Family Member by Mark Sichel

[lynbrown]

You may be writing for a friend and not yourself, so please pass this on. I never felt loved or wanted by my mother but as I got older, I was able to deal with it better,especially after becoming a mum myself. Now I am a granny and try to find some reasons why she was so lacking in affection. I now feel a bit sorry for her, what a sad life to lead, when she could have had all the joy I have in my family.

[CAJ1]

Hi lynbrown,

Thank you for your reply. I was writing about myself, its good to know that it gets easier! I have a habit of just putting things to the back of my head and I really want to just deal with it and be able to move forward.

I agree, its her thats missing out, I'm getting married and I'll be having my own children. I am going to visit my mother for the first time in 10 years and ask her to look me in the eye and tell me she wants nothing to do with me. If she does this, I'm going to try to get the reason from her although I don't think she'll be able to give me one.

Its strange how even though they hurt us like this you still want them to love you.