Crosswords12 mins ago
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I woke up early feeling depressed because it was my birthday, but decided to make the best of it. So I showered, knowing when I went down to breakfast, my wife would greet me with a big kiss and say "Happy Birthday, dear".
All smiles, I went into breakfast and there sat my wife reading the newspaper. She didn't say one word. So I got myself a cup of coffee and thought to myself, oh well, she just forgot. The kids will be in a few minutes all cheery and they will sing Happy Birthday and have a nice gift for me. There I sat, enjoying my coffee, and I waited. Finally, the kids came running in yelling "Give me a slice of toast!", "I'm late."
When I walked into the office, my secretary greeted me with a nice smile and a "Happy Birthday, boss", and said "I'll get you some coffee." Her remembering made me feel a lot better. Later in the morning my secretary knocked on my office door and said "Since it's your birthday, why don't we have lunch together." Thinking it would make me feel better, I said that was a good idea.
So we locked up the office, I said "Why don't we drive out of town and not go to a local place". So we drove out of town and went to a little place and had a couple of martinis and a nice lunch. We started driving back to town when my secretary said "Why don't we go by my place and I'll fix you another martini".
It sounded like a good idea since we didn't have anything to do in the office anyway. So we went to her apartment and she fixed us both a martini and after a while she said "If you'll excuse me, I think I will slip into something more comfortable" and she left the room.
In six minutes, she opened her bedroom door and came out carrying a big birthday cake. Following her was my wife and all my kids and there I sat with nothing on but my socks.
All smiles, I went into breakfast and there sat my wife reading the newspaper. She didn't say one word. So I got myself a cup of coffee and thought to myself, oh well, she just forgot. The kids will be in a few minutes all cheery and they will sing Happy Birthday and have a nice gift for me. There I sat, enjoying my coffee, and I waited. Finally, the kids came running in yelling "Give me a slice of toast!", "I'm late."
When I walked into the office, my secretary greeted me with a nice smile and a "Happy Birthday, boss", and said "I'll get you some coffee." Her remembering made me feel a lot better. Later in the morning my secretary knocked on my office door and said "Since it's your birthday, why don't we have lunch together." Thinking it would make me feel better, I said that was a good idea.
So we locked up the office, I said "Why don't we drive out of town and not go to a local place". So we drove out of town and went to a little place and had a couple of martinis and a nice lunch. We started driving back to town when my secretary said "Why don't we go by my place and I'll fix you another martini".
It sounded like a good idea since we didn't have anything to do in the office anyway. So we went to her apartment and she fixed us both a martini and after a while she said "If you'll excuse me, I think I will slip into something more comfortable" and she left the room.
In six minutes, she opened her bedroom door and came out carrying a big birthday cake. Following her was my wife and all my kids and there I sat with nothing on but my socks.
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the top two of which were posted by you, exactly the same joke so this is its 3rd outing for you on here.
"truthfully honest guv" my 4rse.
http://www.theanswerb...s/Question815540.html
http://www.theanswerb...s/Question815541.html
http://www.theanswerb...s/Question474559.html
the top two of which were posted by you, exactly the same joke so this is its 3rd outing for you on here.
"truthfully honest guv" my 4rse.