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If you assume, it makes an ass out of U and me.

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iirochka | 09:54 Fri 30th Sep 2005 | Phrases & Sayings
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There's a poster outside the church doors, on the top of it there's written: "Jesus is Our Lord" and below - this phrase: If you assume, it makes an ass out of U and me.
I see that Assume = Ass + U + me but that doesn't help me! What kind of a joke can it be? Or is it not a joke? Please, try to explain - I have to transfer it somehow into Russian. Thanks a lot!
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it's a sort of pun - a play on words/letters - and I would have thought that puns are impossible to translate into another language. It's made worse because, as you say, it doesn't actually seem to mean anything, even in English. I would guess that it is suggesting that you should not make assumptions about things without finding out the whole truth; but I have no idea how that connects with 'Jesus is our lord'.
This was a joke made famous in a sketch by comedian Benny Hill, it doesn't mean anything.

Trainers often use the ASS+U+ME bit on management and counselling courses as a bit of light relief.

Anway, if we assume Jesus *is* our Lord (since there is very little in the way of concrete proof), does this mean that we make an ass out of Jesus or the person that wrote the poster, or both? 

ah, didn't know the Benny Hill connection. Personally, I'd kind of prefer a church to quote Jesus rather than Benny Hill, but there you are.
Good place to put it.
it means a donkey a ass is a type of donkey
It's not really a joke, it's sort of a warning against the dangers of assuming something...  You know, like if you stop taking your antibiotics before you've finished the bottle, and you get sick again, you might tell the doctor "well, since I felt better, I assumed I didn't need to keep taking them."  That's a case when he'd point out when you ASSUME, you make an ASS out of U and ME - too many times assumptions are incorrect, or even dangerous.

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