Out of the mouths of babes

[Barmaid]

Just had to share this since I am still crying with laughter.

We had my step son at the weekend. He has significant learning disorder. To help him communicate we have a white board in the kitchen where he can write things down that he likes/doesn't like.

Since he left on Monday I have been trying to decipher his hyroglyphics (sp?). tonight I worked out what it said:-

"***** (his name) will only wash his winky woo in the bath with his face".

We both know what he means, but the way he puts it has had us in stitches.

Any funnies your little ones have come out with you want to share?!

[Barmaid]

lmao!!!!!!!! How red did you go?!

[ummmm]

Very....I was going to pretend I wasn't her Mum....lol

[grasscarp]

One night I said to 4 year old (many years ago) have you been to the toilet (as prone to a bit of bed wetting). No, I havent had had any drinks. Then older sister (nearly 8) piped up "But its not just drinks. Its waste body plasma". no answer to that really!!!

[Barmaid]

lol grasscarp, little buggers!

[ummmm]

Like J telling O that he's adopted. He still questions me to this day....

Kids are cruel...lool

[Barmaid]

Ouch ummm, little sod!

[grasscarp]

btw Barmaid. Smart arse sister is now a barrister!

[SlackAlice]

This threads making me laugh.
Many years ago I was putting some floorboards down watched by my son (4yrs old). I hit my thumb with the hammer very hard, in agony I swore 'F... it'. This obviously was a new word to my boy.

For the next two weeks when something went wrong he said his new buzzword. It was said anywhere including nursery, supermarket, visiting friends or grandparents.

I can keep a straight face, but this just creased me up

[Barmaid]

It would me too SlackAlice!

I have to admit, I spend half my life in tears of laughter at the things he comes out with - particularly when we are out.

Grasscarp - that figures...............

[redcrx]

little CRX (3) the other eve was play sword fighting with her brother. he got bored so she turned to me and my dad and said "so do either of you two want to be killed now?"

[firewatch]

we live on aroughish estate so my little picks up new words.
The best one recently was when staying at friends she fell over and went 'oh Sugar' very loudly on the way down.
Me Do you love daddy
Little one: no no no nooooooooooooo debt

Talk about random lol, best one is when she calls him stupid!!!!!! And the fact doggy and dummy are the same she shouts DIGGA for both.

[annie0000]

My neice, now nearly 30 was sitting eating some of my Dad's homemade soup when she was about 3. After finishing it and almost removing the pattern from the bowl, she turned to him and said "well grandad, I have to say that was absolutely gisdusting" - i think we got the point!

[murraymints]

from my nephew ...when you were alive did you .....

[B00]

Mini Boo was amazed to find "spicy jelly beans" in her spaghetti meatballs the other day, they were kidney beans.

[BAKERS DOZEN]

My grandson had just started school and was taking part in his first nativity play. Only two tickets per child so mum and dad went of course. He came to see us on the friday night and sat down on the settee inbetween Mr BD and myself and started to tell us all about it. He had grasped the "plot" quite well and told us all about the trip that Mary and Joseph had to make on the donkey, there was no room at the inn so they had to sleep in a stable with the animals, the baby was born and the star appeared etc. It was when he got to the part about the three wise men that he cracked us up. Please bear in mind that at that time he had a really broad WIGAN accent. "The three wise men came and they brought gold and frankincense and myrrh - but grandma why didn't they bring the myrrhess as I bet she would have loved to have seen the baby!" Is Wigan the only town in the world that has a Mayor and a Myrrhess? LOL

[tigwig]

Today my 22mth old smiled sweetly at me as I reached over to get him out of the car. He then took his dummy out and said ***! I couldnt help but burst out laughing. He heard his stupid father say it to me last night.

[tigwig]

God I'm stupid, I forgot it wouldnt let me put that word! Its 'd' head!

[Barmaid]

lmao - these are all very funny. Aren't they just daft (if in a rather lovely way?)