what do you think

[Connemmara]

I finally went out after being so ill with vertigo and severe tinnitus. To a dance - may I say. (friends dont know my problem) Anyway it is a bit long winded - one of these friends has come in to £60,000 and has not spent it - now I have my own money and dont any piece of it but when we were away in March - she did pay for a lovely meal. This other friend has been stressing me from March when she asked (as I thought a perfectly friendly question) oh did she pay for the weekend to which I said no. Well since March she has went mad mad mad and has stressed me to the max. I have to say this other friend has stopped seeing her - and seeing them together on Friday I was in nerves that the friend in particular would start - so after staying for a while I left - also the music was deafining woosome and I could not bear it in my hears so that was another reason. I have also assured them there is to be no parties in my house as I now have to think of my neighbour who has problems galore. That was on Friday and I have not heard from any other of them. Perhaps they are now fell out with me now.

[rowanwitch]

Step away it is not your fight tell them you are not taking sides and let them get on with it

[boxtops]

Then tell her again, and tell her you don't want to see her again until she stops this irrational behaviour. She's obsessed. You have to look after yourself, Connemmara - tell the friend to leave you alone until she can talk about something else. Don't tell her it's upsetting you, tell her it's making you angry and what friend 1 does with her money is none - none - of her business.

[jackthehat]

Let 'mad mad mad friend' start on Rich friend, then.

She'll soon find herself to be 'mad mad mad ex-friend', I imagine. Remove yourself from the middle of the situation and let the two of them have it out. After all, it is really nothing to do with you...

[Connemmara]

this lady has not bought anything for anybody except her children. nothing bizarre - I dont want a penny from - splitting trips was never in the equation. never - As I say Friend 1 needs to mind her own bljoody business. Shut the f""ck up.

[ummmm]

And that's her absolute right....

[boxtops]

Good connemmara, that's the spirit - it's nobody's business what that friend does with her money, while she's got in. She might be saving it for nursing home fees in later life, anything - none of our business. You tell your friend what you just said there ^^^

[cazzz1975]

60 grand is not like winning millions, she is right to spend it on her children and family imo

[China Doll]

So dump friend one and crack on. Or leave friend one to deal with friend two and also crack on. I have no idea how any of this can be stressful as it is not your problem so can only assume you're making it stressful yourself by indulging the behaviour. Maybe you are bored and are slighlty enjoying the drama.

[Connemmara]

china doll believe me am not enjoying this one bit but I tell these friends will make their business to involve me - I truly believe nearly all my different friends like me but they dont like each other but put up with each other for me. Haven't heard from them Friday and that is not like them. But I am getting a bit of piece. Perhaps the lull before the storm. I dont have anything to do with it but Friend 1 has involved me for 7 months.

[anneasquith]

try not to fret too much con, it will in time all pass............... its nice to see you posting :)

[China Doll]

You can only become involved in something if you allow yourself to be. If I had a mate trying to drag me in to something I wasn't interested in I would simply tell them I wasn't interested, it was nothing to do with me and I don't want to discuss it with them any more. If they persisted then I simply wouldn't speak to them until they got the message or decided they didn't wnat to be friends anymore; if they fell out with me over it then fine, I could live with that. I think it's an easy problem to deal with but that's just me.

[jno]

I'm not sure how any of this is anything to do with you. Two friends fall out with each other... well, leave them to it. You don't have to dump either one of them if you don't want; but equally you don't have to involve yourself in their disputes. Sit back, have a nice Ovaltine, switch off any loud music, and relax - it's someone else's problem.