Can you call yourself a stepparent if you haven't got any kids yourself, and don't you find the word "Step child/son/daughter offensive?

Yorkiefan | 08:12 Tue 22nd May 2012 | Family Life

45 Answers

We've all been there in a conversation where someone without any kids in a new relationship calls themself a "Step parent" or the kids my "Stepson" or my "Stepdaughter"
Don't you think this is disasterously wrong? Surely you're just the boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife of the childs mum/dad and have no right to call themselves a "step parent especially 9/10 when they have no parenting skills and need years of experience before the word "parent" should even be mulled over lightly or even if they did have kids they are new in this situation and have no right to call themselves this? Besides wouldn't you call the term step child/son/daughter offensive? I know i did when i was growing up.
What are your thoughts on this?

Bednobs

Would you be upset or angry if

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andy-hughes

As this thread shows, there is no hard and fast rule here, people find what works for them, and that is the status they use.

I would never have dreamed of referring to myself as 'step-father' to our two girls when we met - they were six and four, and there was no specific time when things changed - they just evolve into what everyone is comfortable with.

Now they are thirty-seven and thirty-five and as they always have, the call me Andy, and they refer to me as their dad in conversation. Our youngest daughter calls me Dad, and the three of them call me their dad in conversation between them. Even now, i get a flush of pride when i hear them refer to me as their Dad, which is what I am. Their 'father' did the easy bit, the 'dad' part is the hardest. and most rewarding, and I am so glad that's the role I got.

andy-hughes

Further to my last answer - I don't find the term 'step-child' offensive particularly, but i would never use it, and don't like it used about me. As far as i am concerned, we have three daughters.

murraymints

I laughingly call myself the wicked step mother.....and have even had a laugh with teachers at parents nights when I introduce myself as such !!!

RATTER15

Totally agree with Andy-Hughes

Kiki-frog

murraymints - I'm just the same and I was really flattered when my stepson told one of his friends that his step-mum was "well wicked".

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