neighbour trouble

[bunty39]

is there anything i can do about being wrongly accused of reporting a neighbour to the council for his turning his workshop into a house of sorts. this happened 4 years ago and my life is being made a misery. they were made take the structure down in return for permission to build an extension on to their original house. they got permission 2 years ago but are not even half way through with it. doing it themselves. so i have another 2 years at least to put up with living in a building site as well as the unbearable attitude of my neighbours who dont know the true story. as i say, it's making me ill. is there anything i can do?

[tinkerbell23]

Not sure if the council would issue you with an official letter to say the have not recieved any contact from you regarding your neighbours? Give it to them?

Not sure...good luck xx

[ummmm]

What are they doing to make it unbearable?

[bunty39]

thankyou tinkerbell and ummmm.
they already know it wasn't me. in fact nobody reported it., the council knew about it for some time but didn't want to do anything about it without someone reporting it. they asked me and i refused.
i am being shunned by other neighbours, and living in a quiet country area, and being quiet myself, it's getting me down. i couldn't explain the situation to them properly and would probably make things worse

[ummmm]

I don't think there is much you can do about being shunned....as horrible as it is :-(

[tinkerbell23]

Thats really horrible- try for a letter or something?

Im sorry you are being shunned. Feels horrible! Stuff em- talk to us ;0> xx

[bunty39]

thanks once again tinkerbell, it helps to talk, even if there's no obvious solution. i keep thinking that the other neighbours will eventually find out the truth somehow., they don't even know me., how can people believe only one side of a story.

[tinkerbell23]

It definately does thats why i love AB!!! Pop on over to chatterbank whenever you feel upset by crappy neighbours and have a laugh and a chat! Next thing you have wasted 3hours LOL xx

[boxtops]

If they don't know you, why does it matter? Aren't you friendly with any of them, that you could get them on "your side"? (although there doesn't seem to be any side if the builders know it wasn't you, and the rest of them are just gossiping)

[bednobs]

if they already know it wasn't you, then you are not being shunned because of it. Perhaps they just dont like you, or just dont want to associate with you

[bunty39]

thankyou boxtops. i'm not very good at fighting my corner., i know that halfway through trying to explain the situation to neighbours i hardly know and some i haven't even been introduced to i would lose the thread of the story. as far as the neighbours responsible for the unplanned structure are concerned, the wife knows it wasn't me., it was a spiteful move by her daughter which alerted the council. however she prefers to let her husband believe it was me. i'm grateful for your input.

thankyou bednobs, i don't think you've quite grasped the situation but thank you anyway.

[pizza]

Sorry bunty the wife knows it wasn't you and knows it was the spiteful daughter yet she's letting you take the blame ! you deserve an apology !
You need to talk to the wife and let her know this is making you ill and you are not a pawn in their game.
I cannot believe you are letting this happen you need to go to citizens advice and get the help you need otherwise this will escalate and make you more ill !
You need to stand up for your rights bunty x

[bunty39]

thankyou pizza, i really appreciate your understanding of this. there isn't any use approaching the wife who must already have seen how the situation has affected me and to an extent my husband who's worried about me. i've lost two stone and it shows so she knows what it's doing. like i said, pizza i get all excited trying to explain to anyone and just make the situation worse, but thank you again for your understanding and sympathy. i know i can't wave a magic wand but it helps talking to someone like yourself who's grasped the situation, thanks again

[EDDIE51]

Could you write about why it was not you in a letter ?
You could take time to make sure the letter was correct and when you were happy with it hand copies to the neighbours , the wife would not pass a copy to her husband but you could say that unless she did you will tell him directly.

[bunty39]

please forgive me eddie51, i did not see your answer to my question till later.
in fact i did think of doing what you suggested, ( among other things ) but the stuffing is out of me and i'm also trying to satisfy myself with the thought that if those neighbours who have accepted, without question, one side of a story then whatever!! if i keep my dignity a little longer, who knows., it will just take one of the other neighbours to fathom the truth out, and pass it on. here's hoping. thank you eddie51