I hate this time of night

[tinkerbell23]

Its when i feel my worst :0(

[naomi24]

Tinks, I've always said exactly the same. If someone has a broken leg, others sympathise - but it's difficult for anyone who hasn't experienced it to sympathise with a troubled mind. x

[tinkerbell23]

Boxy no this time i woke up and literally couldnt breate i thought i was dying!! I had to talk to myself out loud and pace the house i nearly dialed 999 honestly.

Ive also NEVER sleptwalked in my life and i did once a while ago. Strange.

I also woke up again ran out my bed squealing and found myself in the hall
Id put my room light On- vaguley remeber thinking inwas in a cloud if moths or something....that was likely a nightmare but the panic one was bad...

And the waking up can be 3/4 times a night x

[boxtops]

How I agree with you, naomi - people treat you with suspicion, or just ignore you because they don't understand what it's like.

[MissCommando]

Gosh Tinks, I used to be the same when I was 16, I would panic that I wouldn't wake up in the morning. I used to feel my pulse and convince myself that it was getting fainter and fainter, bloody awful. I would then go out of my bedroom and pace around the landing and talk to my mum. My best thing was to read a magazine, for sure or do an Arrowword. Sorry, this probably hasn't helped you at all. I reckon it's more common than you think.

I think an anti-depressant would be worth a try. My Aunt didn't want to go on them but she was so glad she did. You've got to give it a few weeks to work but you've got nothing to lose.

Keep us updated and never worry about boring anyone. You're more than entitled to come on here for support xx

[tinkerbell23]

I have meditation on iphone/ipad and dvds of nice cracking fires/beaches/fishtanks LOL thyre great.

I REALLY appreciate the chat guys, aswell as the sympathy and for sharing and understanding... It really helps me to relax a bit ....xx

[tinkerbell23]

Last doc i spoke to was brilliant!! Think ill make a trip when i can. Almost willing to try them now... Reluctant but at wits end.

I always thought i was strong etc.....it really p*sses me off that im
Like this lol xx

[naomi24]

Boxy, What I meant when I said rationalise your thoughts was that you have to try to calm the feelings of panic. And I agree - it's good to allow your mind to wander to a nice place.

Tinks, I'm going to bed. I sincerely hope you get some rest. Try not to worry. Much love to you. x

[ELVIS68]

Tinks whatever you do don't fall for that old chestnut about counting sheep.

I tried it once and froze my fecking nuts off! x

[Mojo-Jo-Jo]

I nearly died. It's not unpleasant.
So think nice stuff when you think you're dying and try to recondition it. Fear is at the root of this.

[tinkerbell23]

Naomi as ever been lovely chatting xxxx sweet dreams!!


Mega mega mega fear!!!!!

Pmsl @ elvis ill remember that... ;0> xxx

[tiggerblue10]

I think anti-depressants may be a good idea Tinks, but just be weary about the first few days. I was prescribed prozac for several months around 10 years ago for depression but for the first few days I felt terrible. I don't know if all anti-deps do that though.

[tinkerbell23]

Hmmm. Thanks tiggs.... Mabye i should. Its all so scary i just want to be normal.

I think that ill never shake this fear no matter what tabs that i take :(

I enjoy my counselling but i almost expected to "see the light" like something would hit me like a tonne of bricks and id be cured! Lol x

[boxtops]

You will be better, tinks, as long as you hang on to that fact, and climb up one tiny step at a time. There's no "light bulb moment" - you'll just get better, a bit at a time, until one day you'll realise that you haven't been anxious for a few hours, then a couple of days..... you have to try to stop self-analysing though, and looking back - life is forwards....

[Mojo-Jo-Jo]

Has the doctor looked at the idea of vertigo?
I know when I've had bouts of it it feels worse. I still hate the feeling of falling, like my heart is stopping, but I'm not frightened of it any more.
It happens to lots of us. What you need to conquer is your fear of something biological. You're a nurse, I reckon you can do it.

[boxtops]

Sometimes being a nurse or doctor isn't that helpful, you can know a bit too much....

[tiggerblue10]

Most of us have a fear of one thing or another and your fear is dying (sounds like thanatophobia). You are not alone though Tinks, your fear is quite common.

I have a completely irrational fear or phobia of worms but at least they don't plague my mind, morning, noon and night. I just shiver with fear and my skin crawls whenever I see one.

[tinkerbell23]

You are all SO kind! Just starting work...two shifts today, two wards!

Thanks so so sooo much!! Talk to you all tonight xxxx