ChatterBank13 mins ago
Jokes or not
A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea-captain.
'What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?'
'Throw out an anchor, sir.'
'What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?'
'Throw out another anchor, sir.'
'And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do?'
'Throw out another anchor.'
'Hold on,' said the Captain, 'where are you getting all your anchors from?'
'From the same place you're getting your storms, sir.'
A new blonde employee calls the help desk to complain that there's something wrong with her password. No, it's not the usual caps-lock problem.
"The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows stars," she says.
"Those asterisks are to protect you," the Help Desk technician explains.
"So if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn't be able to read your password."
"Yes," she says, "but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me."
Teacher: Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student: A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher: How?
Student: Ladies first.
A drunk man was brought to court.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
The drunk man immediately responded, "Thank you, your honour; I'll have a scotch and soda."
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Yes please, what are my choices?
Wife: yes and no.
'What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?'
'Throw out an anchor, sir.'
'What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?'
'Throw out another anchor, sir.'
'And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do?'
'Throw out another anchor.'
'Hold on,' said the Captain, 'where are you getting all your anchors from?'
'From the same place you're getting your storms, sir.'
A new blonde employee calls the help desk to complain that there's something wrong with her password. No, it's not the usual caps-lock problem.
"The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows stars," she says.
"Those asterisks are to protect you," the Help Desk technician explains.
"So if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn't be able to read your password."
"Yes," she says, "but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me."
Teacher: Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student: A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher: How?
Student: Ladies first.
A drunk man was brought to court.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
The drunk man immediately responded, "Thank you, your honour; I'll have a scotch and soda."
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Yes please, what are my choices?
Wife: yes and no.
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