Geriatric Fisticuffs.

[gness]

I have got to a grand old age without ever being involved in a fight.
A Mod on a motor bike. Demonstrations, pop and rock concerts and three OFSTED inspections. Two Mothers-in-Law.

Today that changed. I was in a fight!
Visited Ma in care. She has forgotten everyone in her life except for two and sadly I am one of the two. She hasn't forgotten she dislikes me either so it was the usual snap at Gness visit, thumping my chair and slapping my arm until.....!
Lil joined in. Lil likes me....I bring her wool and craft bits and we chat about her hobbies. Lil decided to defend me...unfortunately I was sitting between Ma and Lil, neither of whom could get out of their chair.
Ma started singing and slapping Lil's hands. Lil started swearing (with apologies) and slapping Ma's hands and for some inexplicable reason I joined in??????
It was like a demented, high speed game of Pat-a-Cake. Until Ma looked at me, told me I should have a professional do something about my hair and I could bloody well clear off and climb Croagh Patrick to repent.
May just cut down on my visits. :-)

[gness]

I was a Mod who loved motor bikes Owd. Mary Quant clothes etc. but rode an AJS 350. x

[petal54]

'wild thing'

[gness]

Hope I still am Petal.....albeit on a zimmer frame. Customised of course.

[Ann]

Gness I love reading your posts, they are so descriptive! I'm sure I wasn't supposed to, but it made me laugh so much, even if it is so sad to end up like your Ma. That scares me, that one day we will end up in care and be like that. You and your brother sound so nice, and long suffering. xx

[gness]

We've coped with humour Ann for seven or eight years now but it is scary.
How are you? A good evening? x

[Ann]

Hi gness, feeling much better thanks and had a great evening with friends, had a BBQ at their house for our Anniversary, lovely warm evening too! :)

[Psybbo]

Gness, you are not alone and your spirit and courage amaze me. I find the experience makes me more caring of my own children and make sure they know how much I love them. I know you are the same.
Hugs from another bad daughter xxx

[gness]

Hi Sib. My mother made me really think about how I am with my children. x

[gness]

Bit of an update...B and SIL went in today and Ma is dreadful with him now and took a while to remember who he was. Very aggressive and nasty. The screeching is annoying the other residents but at least she is now eating on her own so no danger from cutlery.
We have decided to cut down on visiting as we seem to make her worse but I don't think it will be long before she is sectioned.
B is very upset but he is a lovely softie. Me?......Well.
I would like her to die. Not for any selfish reason. Whatever my feelings I do so feel for someone who is sitting, day after day, in the same chair without the least little joy or pleasure in life. Wrong of me I suppose but I'm sure if she could choose..............?

[Psybbo]

Will she be allowed to stay there, gness?

[gness]

I don't know Sib. Depends how bad she becomes and it will be such a shame if she has to move. A lot of my work in my first school involved visiting care homes so I know how really good this one is. We were lucky to get her in last year and it's near me.
The alternatives are not nice.

[DTCwordfan]

I can understand where you are coming from gness, a person who is a shadow of themselves, it's a terrible way to go but then do they know? It may be more of a torture for their progeny

[gness]

We were saying that today DT. She probably doesn't remember yesterday. But it's hard to witness the decline.
The laugh came from middle sister who hasn't visited or spoken to us in years. Sent a note, out of the blue, to say she's been in touch with the home and was glad Ma hadn't deteriorated.! Always one. :-)

[DTCwordfan]

All you can do is laugh or take some vid footage and send her....make her feel bad, or is she fishing....says he cynically

[gness]

Head in sand and a bit of fishing, DT. Frightened she may have to do something.

[DTCwordfan]

http://www.freeclipar...rich-head-In-Sand.jpg

[gness]

Exactly DT. :-)