Any advice?

[sherrardk]

My 12 year son is so miserable at the moment. He gets upset at the slightest thing and seems so angry when I try to get to the bottom of it. We have had a big discussion tonight and I have made it clear that I am really worried about him but he can't seem to find a reason for how miserable he is. Could this be puberty? If so, is there anything I can do to help him or does he just have to get on with it? (Would it be helpful, if it is puberty, to show him appropriate sites on the Internet which clearly highlight that mood swings and anger are part of the process (he is fully aware of the changes to his body, etc but not of the emotional side - I would discuss it with him but he might think I am just making it up to make him feel better.). Thanks for any advice or ideas.

[Anngel]

lol @ ladybirder. Reading this I was thinking just the same. some teenagers can be an absolute nightmare. You might try cutting down on the red meat....

[ELVIS68]

I do hope he's not being bullied, a lot does go on unseen by the teachers.

Has he got a group of friends on the bus?, maybe you could have a quiet word with one of their parents.

[sherrardk]

Hi Elvis, as an ex-teacher and his mam, I am pretty sure he is not being bullied (I have used all the tricks that normally get to the root of the problem). Himself has had a couple of tries at getting to the bottom of it too. I will see how it goes but not adverse to speaking to the school and getting his friends parents to do a bit of digging too. Thanks for your replies though, x (no one warns you how hard all this is going to be)

[ELVIS68]

Me and the missus were worried about our youngest son who started senior school this term after our eldest son told us about the kids on the bus pick on the newbies.

First day, off they went on the bus, little brother and big brother, 8 hours later when they get home, big brother informs us little brother is the 'star' of the bus and had them all cracking up with laughter!

Kids eh!

Hope you get it sorted :o)

[annie0000]

If it's any consolation Sher, i have two 12 year old boys in the back of my car to school and back every day and it's like driving a hearse!! Despite them being best friends and speaking to each other happily on skype when they get home - they utter not a word to each other while in my presence. I've told them they better cheer up, or wake up or whatever as they are making me depressed!!! I believe that they are not like like this all day at school as they seem happy enough and tell me they are enjoying it, it's obviously just having an adult (or maybe just me) in the vicinity that cramps their style.

Maybe your boy isn't so miserable when he is out of your company? I know that sounds bad, but I don't mean it in that way honest :)

[sherrardk]

Thanks Annie. We had a big chat last night (not the best timing as thing 1 and 2 had their first full day of school and weren't in the best of moods). He seemed a little bit brighter today. Me and himself have decided to make sure any potential flash points for tears are eliminated as much as possible (trying to guess what might possibly set him off) and to be more tolerant of any little outbursts. Sometimes forget that he is just a little boy really.

[Jemisa]

There's someone on the horizon... He's in love... he's not going to tell you but you ask nim I bet he gets all angry about it...
Another sign of puberty, unrequited love. His body or his mind can't cope with it. When my son was 12 - 13 this was his problem.
Sher, could this be an answer?

Jem

[sherrardk]

Hi Jem, maybe, but he is a young 12 so maybe not. Since our chat he is a bit better and me and his dad have gone out of way to eliminate flashpoints (usually involving his siblings) and I have made him his favourites teas and even went mad today and made him scones (just to reinforce that I love him and I want him to be happy).