What do you think of my new song?

[shouldwecuddle]

I just made a rough recording for a song so i can make adjustments when i do the final recording, let me know what you think please! It'll only take a couple minutes a few clicks. Any feedback is appreciate as long as it's constructive.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CGIJEne0p8

[pizza]

Me thinks us abbers aint in2 rap
Donald Duck makes me wonna snap
The best thing is the waters swell
Coz the rap just didn't gel
Maybe give Xfactor a definite miss
Coz they'll think ur takin the piss
4 us it a def no no on this site
u gotta realise bad in fact it's s**te

[Mick-Talbot]

You need a lyricist , shouldwe

Ask DT to help out, you could call yourself 'Bard Rapper'

[Bluestone]

Lol MT.
Yep, we already have our very own Eminem here, shoullwe. His name's DT, and he's not to be messed with. Ya get me.

[squarebear]

To be honest, I think you are probably on the wrong site for feedback for this.

I like it. Nice chord progression. The female backing vocal is really good and works well. The altered "duck" vocal needs removing though. It adds nothing and I can't undersdtand what it says.