Worried Shes Entering Into Darkness

[inamuddle1]

I have a friend who is being used by this guy, has been for a good while now. He wants her to be his slave. He makes arrangements with her and she gets really excited and then he cancels last minute. Meanwhile, she has gone out and got all prepared for there meeting. And even the meeting lasts no longer than 2 hours and then he's gone for another couple of months. I know my friend likes him becasue she's always speaking about him, and from what I can see, it only texts here every once in a while. I see it becoming something more than what what they had orginally started. He recently told her to forget him, so she did. She deleted his number from her phone, and sure enough 10 days later he got in touch, asking if they could meet, and she fell right back into the same trap with him, got all excited about his visit, and once again he cancelled last minute.

I know the sex they are having is very extreme, and he wants her purely for sex. He has said that, and my friend, well she is interested in the dark side of this relationship, she wants tied up and involved in some kinky stuff, although she admits to being a bit scared, as this guy she knows, he follows his word, so if he says they are going to try something, they are going to do it. He's interested in threesomes and stuff like that, spanking and anal sex. They had an argument today because he cancelled last minute and now my friend is thinking about sending him a message saying she'll do anything he asks, and be his sexual slave. I know she finds it arousing, but I'm worried she'll get hurt.

[friedgreentomato]

Well she will need to set down the rules with hard and soft safewords, if you want to understand it better there are some books on the market that may help.

[China Doll]

What your friend does is up to her.

[Old_Geezer]

He doesn't sound good for her, doesn't sound a caring relationship, but ultimately you can't make decisions on your friend's behalf. As a friend it's fair to express your concern for her, but after that it's her life, her decision. Just be there if needed.

[Iluvspikey]

As everybody else has said, just be there for her. Tell her not to be coerced into anything she doesn't want to do, and to remember to practice safe sex.

[lindapalmara]

Sounds like he's been reading "fifty shades"!

[Snafu03]

and her mobile number is?

[Jasw]

Lots of people dabble in this type of stuff now and I think, whilst it is natural to a degree, that some are purely bored or pressured into it. You can't tell people to stop doing stuff that may hurt them because they have to make their own mistakes. I used to think being a good friend was trying to prevent people from getting hurt by others but I have changed my mind. I think we are all responsible for ourselves and if some people get hurt that is their choice, their tough luck and their karmic path. It is very different with vulnerable adults and children, we all have a duty to watch out for them, but as far as I am concerned everyone else is exercising free will and all any of us can do for our friends is to be there to help pick up the pieces when stuff goes wrong, if we choose to. You have made your feelings known so you can sleep easy.

[rowanwitch]

It is pretty much par for a slavemaster who doesn't understand his role.and responsibilities.. if she is into this stuff she would be better to find a more experienced playmate

[yogi-bear]

http://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/Body-and-Soul/Question1172092.html


Hmmmm, very strange...... you sound in a muddle, inamuddle.

I take it this in Spain where you've lived the last 2 years?


If this is for you, its up to you....if its for your "friend" its up to her. :0)

[RATTER15]

Leave her to it, she sounds like she is lapping it up, are you jealous?

[pastafreak]

I agree,yogi. Particularly based on some of the OP's original queries.
Inamuddle-this sounds a very one-sided relationship. It needs to be mutual in order to work. If she were my friend,I'd counsel her to distance herself from him.

[Zacs-Master]

but I'm worried she'll get hurt.

I don't think she is!