Is Chivalry Really Dead ?

[Scylax]

According to a recent survey ( D. Telegraph 15 /1/13), many, many women would be suspicious of a man who opened a door, gave up a seat in a bus, etc. as an act of good manners/ chivalry. Personally, I shall continue to do this - I'd be less than a man otherwise Agree ?

[LazyGun]

Quite surprised to hear that many women would consider such acts of politeness as suspicious.

I will continue to open the door for anyone just as I will continue to offer a seat if I think someone looks in need of one, regardless of their gender..

[paddywak]

I try to be polite and well mannered as I was taught to be by my parents, sadly though like sandy if I travel by bus I tend to be on the receiving side.

[wolf63]

I think that some women feel that to accept a seat etc is a sign that they are weaker and not able to fend for themselves.

If a guy gives up a seat willingly then it will make him feel good too.

[NOX]

Equal rights have nothing whatsoever to do with good manners and yes I do give up seats, open doors, help with heavy things etc. because it's good manners and always will be.

[vulcan]

I read this in the Telegraph this morning before I went out. Normally I open doors etc but decided to make a special effort to check reactions. To my surprise everybody, female, male, young & old, thanked me and most with a smile, quite made my day. So,on this day anyway, good manners were not dead.

[mibn2cweus]

Good manners are for those capable of appreciating the effort. The others don't deserve it anyway . . . although it's not necessarily always a good idea to remind them of the fact. That was my second mistake. :o/

[joko]

i agree nox - these are two different things

manners should be extended to everyone regardless of circumstances, however there are certain things that i would find extremely annoying if a man tried to do them for me - such as the man, who i didnt even know, who i ended up having a meal with because our mutual friend was called away after we had sat down - who tried to order my food for me!
i was furious.
when i was younger i used to get irritated when my dad used to put his hand on my back and sort of 'usher' me forward, sometimes a bit forcefully, whenever we went into any building - (or my sister or mum) - it felt like he was trying to announce that we are his girls - i know other men do it too - unnecessary and pointless gesture that i never understood.


chivalry, when it amounts to nothing more than politeness and manners is great but i dont like anything that appears to be a lingering element of sexism and old fashioned 'ownership'.

[ClareA]

I agree with almost all of the answers. Good and considerate manners should be the province of all, to give or to receive, irrespective of age or gender.
I object to the type of so-called 'consideration' which some resort to - the half-hearted apology for swearing 'in front of a lady'. I drink in a quite blokey pub and if they aren't used to me by now, they ought to know that I've not only said it, I've done it as well! That's a type of 'false' and belittling manners which they might display in front of some imaginary maiden aunt: a woman who does not exist in the 21st century, contrary to their stuck-in-the-19th century thoughts!
(Such people often think nothing of farting in front of anyone - much more offensive, I think).