Redressing The Balance

[Barmaid]

OK, so we are lightheartedly putting our other halves up for loan.

What do you think they would say about you?!!!!

I'll start.

Stroppy mare who can't be spoken to in the morning before essential caffeine and nicotine intake. Cooks well, gardens well, good with children and small animals. Does OK upstairs. Messy cow who treats car like skip and when she dyes her hair dyes the whole bathroom. Can parallel park if you don't talk to her. Don't mess with her in the kitchen, she's good with knives and we are running out of crockery. Finds things.

[mrs_overall]

erm....thank you bbananas

Gness, what do you mean by QUITE short?

[mazie]

I'd employ you or marry you just for the Axe Gness.

My Old man thinks I'm utterly crazy and I think would swop me tomorrow.

[gness]

Errr...Not very tall????

[Bbbananas]

Anal about cretins????? Sorry, that should say curtains, I'm drunk. Again. Gness and mrs o, u have made my night..... Well, until something better comes along. ;-)

[gness]

Thank you Mazie...it's a lovely axe....hangs in my kitchen. x

[mazie]

I really want one...I have a thing about Axes

[EcclesCake]

^^^ Ooh, I'm not sure, my post came across quite as I intended; apologies to VnC!

It was a general view that Mr Cake might want to trade me in for a better housekeeper and that moody bats will be considered.

[gness]

"You have made my night...until something better comes along" Ohhh how many times have I heard that. :-(

[Jeza]

I know what Mic would say. Brilliant wife, lousy housekeeper.

[RATTER15]

Im not saying, Im probably too perfect for words anyway.

[humbersloop]

ace at painting and varnishing, rubbish welder, dangerous with an angle grinder. Always smells nice. Will consider trial transfer for water sail rig.

[DTCwordfan]

Bard and say no more.

[moonraker558]

Well dressed country bumkin available for escort duty for suitable old trollop.
Satisfaction guaranteed in return for a hearty meal washed down with some real ale. If compatable I may let you wash my smalls while I watch your telly. So don't wait give me a call, I will be waiting to whisk you of for a night on the town on my stretch tractor limo. References can be supplied via TTFN.

[ttfn]

"Well dressed"? thudddddd

They'll be lucky if you were "Well, dressed"

"Satisfaction guaranteed"???

Paramedics for ttfn ...

[rowanwitch]

Fat bat with too much attitude
Artistic and creative... good cook untidy chaotic but fun
forgets to tell him stuff

[mallyh]

60+ female, cow in morning before coffee intake,two new hips, skin needs a good iron ,wicked sense of humour