when is he asking you out or just being polite?

[GraceAnais]

here's the scenario - you go on a date with a guy. it goes fine. at the end he asks you what you're up to at the weekend. you say you're busy (cos you are) then he asks you what you're up to sunday, once again you say your busy (cos you genuinely are) then he says that you'll probably see each other at a mutual friends party but you say you aren't going. then he never bothers to arrange a date with you for another time.

did he think i was blowing him out by saying iwas busy? Are they actually asking you out on a date or what? if a man asks you if your busy should you say , 'yes, but i'm free saturady' or would that be full on? was he just being polite asking me what i was up to at the wkend? so confused and once again i'm expecting you kind people to enlighten me!!!

[Mistopheles]

I'd say he was asking you out, and probably thinks you aren't interested. I would drop him a casual email / text, saying sorry I was so busy, but does he fancy getting together next weekend? If he says no, he's busy, then back off - but I definitely think the ball's in your court at the moment!

[Kirki]

he was probably interested in asking you out on another date. and all three times you said you were busy so the poor guy probably thought you wern't interested. you should have probably told him when you were free next, if you have his number give him a call and ask him on a second date!

[gary baldy]

Poor fella! Thats a blow out if ever i heard one.
Blinking women!
No wonder he didnt bother to arrange another date - he gave you three chances to say "no but i can make......etc".
I would nt drop him a casual text - if you like this bloke you should actively go out of your way and apologise for any misunderstanding and would he like to go out sometime?
Why cant women just say what they are actually thinking? Nothing personal Grace - you sound quite nice actually - just a bit, erm well, like a woman!

[Tock389]

I'm with the majority on this, as a bloke, as this has happened to me before and I ALWAYS assume I'm being blown out.

It would be great for him to get a text from you suggesting a date - it doesn't mean you're going to jump into bed with him, but that you genuinely would like to see him again.

If he says no, he's busy, but then he suggest another time, then everything is OK. If he says "I'm busy" but won't suggest an alternative, then back off.

It's up to you now, not him- good luck!

[{Dakota}]

LOL @ Gary !

It sounds very much like he was trying to ask you out on a second date. If he kept suggesting alternatives days you should have bitten the bullet and suggessted a time when you would have been available. Well, it's done now, so I agree with kirki, go ahead and send him a text / e-mail saying just that and try to arrange another time.

Good luck x

[Drusilla]

Oh dear GraceAnais, only a committed stalker wouldn't think he'd been rejected by you after that!

[snook]

I have to agree with all that's been said - he must've felt like a right chump! He may never take the risk again - with anyone! Is it any wonder us blokes are frightened to ask you ladies out when you can be so (apparently) heartless? I know you didn't mean it, but dear oh dear...

Here's a tip for you, GraceAnais - although us blokes quite like to appear as macho brutes, inside we're quite fragile really... specially when you get a knock-back like that, that must've felt like a kick in the... well, you get the picture.

[Scarlett]

If you like him, I think you should make time to see him!! Why not phone him up and say "You know I had x on Saturday, well it has been cancelled- fancy meeting up again?" or something...