Perfect Plot For The Next Carry On Film?

[hc4361]

Need a good title though - Carry On...........?

Brief outline, group of wanna be terrorist bombers led by Saaed Jahm plan to bomb an EDL rally hosted by Zenna Phobes 100 odd miles away.

Bombers load their car with bomb equipment and a wide selection of knives and sawn off shotguns.

Off they tootle up the motorway. Meanwhile the rally is already winding up for lack of speakers. Hardly surprising as some of the participants don't have the ability to speak - they just grunt and point.

Bombers are very disappointed to find their target have got away and head home, dejected.

This is not the end of their sorry saga, however, for the hapless fools are using an uninsured vehicle and are stopped by PC Cortem who searches the vehicle and finds the home made bomb, the knives and guns.

The film has a happy ending as the wannabe bombers are all found guilty. Hurrah!

It proves real life is stranger than fiction.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-22344054

Now, what shall we call the film?

[jomifl]

Ludwig, notice that they didn't specify the death of whom or what.

[ludwig]

^ good point.

[FredPuli43]

Carry on plotting? Difficult.. Not the mot incompetent crooks. I knew of a bank robber who disguised everything; covered face, false plates on the getaway vehice, the lot; but forgot he was wearing a leather jacket with his name in studs on the back. And the Irish forgers forging wages cheques who knew that cheques would have numbers in sequence but changed the number on the account instead of the cheque number, resulting in puzzled account holders at the same branch each getting a cheque with the same number presented. Or another bunch of forgers who got caught because, while making hundreds of thousands of pounds, forgot to use any of it to pay the rent on the place where the printing was done;result, the landlord went in and found the press and the forgeries.

Or, best of all, the bank robbers who got one of their number to provide a getaway car. He borrowed his father's car, whereupon father thought it had been nicked and told the police. When they got to the bank, nobody had remembered stocking masks, so they drove off to buy something. One went into a shop and bought tights. They drive back to the bank. Then they found they had two pairs of tights for four of them, but nothing to cut the tights with. So they drove off again and bought scissors. Went back to the bank. By this time the police had been watching the wanted car drive round the bank several times and were waiting. The gang piled out of the car, rushed to the bank, but collided while going though the door and fell in a heap. They were still getting up when grabbed by the police.

[jomifl]

There was also a bunch of burglars who borrowed a pickup truck belonging to the employer of one of them. Parked under the street lights the 'Fred Smith(or similar) Builders' was clearly visible to the security camera across the road.
The best one was the computer enthusiast who set up his security system to phone his ipad when his house's 'integrity' was 'compromised'. So there he was on holiday in the Balearics when he got the call, after a few keystrokes he accessed his security cameras and could view his house being burgled in real time. One phonecall to Blighty and they were nicked whilst in the act of committing a felony.. :-) I wonder that these petty criminals dare leave their home now.

[hc4361]

:D You couldn't make it up!

[AlwaysConfused]

I think it should be called ' Under This Government'

[Svejk]

//one phone call to Blighty & they were nicked//
Blimey, must have been the Chief Constable.