child maintainance

[waterbaby123]

could someone tell me if i have to pay my ex maintainance to my child. they are claiming income support and have put me down as father unknown although my name is on the birth cert.

my ex is requesting 30 pounds a week off me but i dont think that there spending the money on my child, so i was wondering if i was to bank the money and buy them clothing as and when needed will this be acceptable or will i still have to pay it to them?

[woofgang]

if she has put you down as father unknown to get benefit, yet your name is on the birth cert, this could be a problem if she tries to enforce her claim for money.

If you are concerned that the money will be misspent and the child will go without if your ex is given money rather than items for the child, then I think that you should get some expert advice.

Can I suggest that the citizens' Advice bureau would be a good place to start. Do keep in mind that your ex may be spending the money on things like heating, light water, rent which do benefit your child, even though the money is not spent on the child directly

[lynneuk74]

Do you give her the money direct? I had this problem with an ex of mine. His ex-wife got money from him direct then stood up in court and said he hadn't paid her anything!!!

From then on I made him pay the money to the courts so there was an official record.

It sounds like she is trying to have her cake and eat it - claiming benefits as a single mum but expecting money from you.

If I was you - like woofgang says - I'd get some legal advice. It is much better to do this kind of thing legally (unless you are able to work it out amicably amongst the two of you).

[Mrs_Pegasus]

She will be committing fraud if she claims her full entitlement as well as taking the money from you. Any money received from you should be deducted from her claim. Therefore, she is receiving undeclared income from you.

�30 is reasonable regardless how she spends it. Sorry to sound harsh but I receive �50 from my ex for our child and if I started to write down every single penny I spent on her it would exceed that amount I can tell you. Avoid going down that road, its pointless.

Take a look at the CSA website and get an estimated amount of what you would be asked to pay if she took that route.

[waterbaby123]

i would like to just thank you all for your replys as this as given me something to really think about wishing you all a happy new year

[peeriesooky]

she can get money through the csa only if she declares you as the father as you are on the birth cert. She can not expect you to pay money any other way but be careful because if she is accepting money from you but not declaring it you will have no proof you paid and you will be taken for back payments so if you are paying her make sure you have a record of it but if you go to the csa ytou probably wont take as much as 30 from you . i have 2 children and dont receive that much. if you do it by the book then you know you are looking after your child and yourself but also if you are paying for the child, do you have regular contact?

[JudgeJ]

I don’t want to get involved with whether you should pay. It seems a complex issue from what you say. It’s more to do with the amount. Presumably you feel obliged to provide for the child, so do you seriously consider that �30 per week is sufficient to raise a child? Or is the �30 just your contribution to the greater funding, which is provided by others, for the upkeep of your offspring?

Ask yourself this: if the child was living with you, do you think it would cost as little as �30 per week to keep the child, let alone yourself, in basic necessities?

[emmae]

I hate to say this but your ex is commiting fraud. The DWP allow #10 for maintenence which you can pay her legally into her bank account. Anything over this would be taken away from her by the DWP. If she works you can pay and she can keep any amount.

Also, the money is for upkeep. Not all for spending on your child. It should be classed as part of the family income and used against anything that is necessary. Bills, days out, debts, food etc.

My advice would be to pay your ex #10 direct to her bank account from yours (therefore having proof and avoiding DWP taking money back) and perhaps spend the other #20 direct on the child by buying clothes and shoes as these are then gifts (keep receipts if worried).

I wish my ex would pay something. It is difficult to juggle everything on benefits, I wish I could work.