shall i try to get over her or hope for anther chance?

[slimbo]

i have recently split up with my girlfriend and i am badly inlove with her. i was with her for 5 months and she just split up with me and said that she wanted to just be friends. she says that she hopes we can get back together in the near future so we know that we are right for eachother. the heartbreak is unbeleivable and i really dont know whether to wait and hope that we will get back together or tru to get over her. how long will this pain last? can anyone give me some advice?

[badboy4life]

You my friend are single, show her what shes missing go out tonight on the pull. go somewhere where you know some of her friends are going to be. when she hears how much fun your having she'll want you back.

[Trojanfarce]

Sorry you're hurting like this Slimbo, I fully understan what you're going through. As to whether you should hopd on in the hope of getting back, well that's a tough one. It's tough because if you think there's a chance, then that gives you hope, and hope just prolongs the pain. Of course, she may genuinely wnat to get back with you later but my advice now would be to do the best you can to get over her, build a life without her and then, if and when, you get back together, you can see if that is what you want.

I'm afraid that the pain will be with you a while yet (sorry to be so blunt), but it does fade over time (big cliche, but true). try to fill your days so that you have little time to dwell on her, and try to stay away from the bottle (or worse), believe me it doesn't work.

Good luck

[slimbo]

yes i would like to get over her but she is a good mate and she is friends of my friends so i cant just ignore her. what does anyone suggest?

[kazza12345]

i was in exactly the same position some years ago except i was the one who wanted a break. My "ex" and i both went out with some other people, got some new frieds so things werent claustrophobic, and he tried like mad to get me back. I the "space" that i had, i realised it really is true that you dont know what you've got till it's gone and we've now been married for 5 years. Husband said he always got by by thinking "if you love her, let her go, if it's meant to be she'll come back" and it was true, i am so grateful now for his persistance because being without him was awful

[slimbo]

yes but it fels so hard not to be with her, she is all i think about. do you think i should try my hardest to get her back or wait it out discretly?

[kazza12345]

i can only tell you what happened to us, as i dont know the ins and outs of your relationship - i appreciated him giving me space, and he was around in the background as just a friend

[joko]

whatever you do, don't be pushy and keep on about it. wait it out, be patient, show her how great you are.

don't be clingy or 'claiming' or make judgements - she will get irritated with you and any feelings she has left for you will turn to resentment.

let her know you still like her but leave it at that.

without knowing what you did to make her split with you - if anything at all - its hard to know what to advise. sometimes these things just aren't meant to be - remember, in life you only ever have ONE truly successful relationship - until one of you dies. (obviously there are some circumstances where you may have two) but generally there is only one 'forever'.

[xlaurax]

she clearly needs some time to get her head round some things and its important u giveher the time but make sure you let her no ur still here and waiting weneva shes ready give her a call now and then and offer to go for a drink if she wants to she'll go if not then maybe you should just back off if your menat to be together she will realise it but dont let her leave you hanging