Toothache - 5 Year Old

[Baby_Sham]

My daughter has been complaining of toothache. I took her to the dentist but it was a complete disaster. She refused to open her mouth and was extremely distressed - as was the poor dentist!
He said there was a hole in one of the back teeth that he could fill, and it would then drop out in time. However, she wouldn't let him do this, and he only managed to see it for a brief moment when she opened her mouth for a few seconds.
He said the only thing he can do is refer her to the dental hospital where they will put her to sleep and extract the tooth. I am really really nervous about this happening but can't seem to convince her that she'd be better off just coming back to the dentist with me and letting him fill it. She gets really upset and anxious.

My question is, is there anything I can do to help with the pain whilst we wait for this appointment?
She won't take any medicine at all, despite me trying everything and even putting it in a yogurt (she always tastes it and spits it out) so I've been using a hot water bottle for her to rest her check on.

I know it sounds like a lost cause, but I hate seeing her in pain and just wondered if any other parents have any suggestions. I was up most of the night with her last night, crying in pain. I've tried explaining that a small spoonful of medicine will help her, but she just gets herself into a complete state and refuses to have any.

I will check back later for replies. For now, I have to go out and get BBQ supplies :-)

[2sp_]

Why don't you take a spoonful of Calpol first and let her see that it's nothing to worry about?

It must be a nightmare for you both.

I had to have a tooth extracted at the dentist when I was 4. I had to be pinned down by the dentist, his nurse and my mother so they could put the mask on my face to knock me out. I remember it vividly and know now that it was for my own good, but during my childhood I had serious issues with dentists and I think this episode may have caused the claustrophobia I suffer from now.

Thank goodness that they no longer knock kids out at dental surgeries. I know it may sound strange, but I think going to the dental hospital for the treatment under a general anaesthetic would be easier on her than getting a local at the dentist.

Good luck.

[Mojo-Jo-Jo]

I completely agree with you Morrigan as it goes

[Baby_Sham]

Themorrigna, no I don't think bad of you for saying that at all. I have indeed tried that method, but it went everywhere and she just ended up more stressed. Good idea about putting more on the spoon that required though. I'd never thought of doing that and it's a good tip!
I realise all kids are different but she's just the complete opposite to my son. He's so relaxed and laid back and I've never encountered these kind of tantrums until now, with madam. I know you have to be cruel to be kind, and it's for the greater good. It's just hard when she's screaming the house down shouting "noooooooooo"! :-/

[Connemmara]

Sorry Baby-Sham the bloody dentists can give it to them but you know what they don't (don't upset the budget!).

[Baby_Sham]

2sp, it is really stressful. On the one hand I'm trying to be all nice about it with her, but on the other hand I'm trying to explain that if she takes the medicine she won't be in such pain. It's like this with everything though, tummy aches, fever. You name it, she'd rather suffer.
I dread every meal at the moment, afraid that something will start her tooth off hurting and we'll go through it all again. It seems once it starts it's then there for the rest of the night. It's not nice seeing her in such pain, but I also get that feeling of frustration too.
When it happens again I'm just going to do as some of you've advised and force her to take the calpol. Oh god, that sounds awful.

Thanks again.

[Baby_Sham]

Oh really? I thought they'd stopped with the whole gas and air/putting to sleep thing these days. I hardly ever go to the dentist though, as I have a major phobia! I know, I know...

[themorrigan]

Baby_Sham I feel your pain I really do as one of mine was a drama queen and otherwise very loving and nice so it broke my heart to be so tough but it worked. If she screams around the house saying no I would suggest you put her on her own in a room and tell her she can come out when she's settled down. Tell her 'no' is not an option, but should she say OK then she will get lots of treats and do something special with mummy all on her own (you must follow up on this) if she still refuses tell her what the hard way will be and let her choose. I do hope you get sorted at the hospital asap don't stress out over it she will be in safe hands xx

[Octavius]

They don't tend to do much of that in the chair these days as it as proven risky in the recent past. So it may well not be on offer and they will refer you to the hospital.

[Sparkles62]

Conne, they haven't used gas/ anaesthetic in the dentists for years now, they are not allowed to.
I agree with 2sp I had terrible experiences as a child, leaving me with a dental phobia and claustrophobia. X

[Baby_Sham]

Ha ha yes, drama queen is the way I would describe her!
Thanks for all the help. I do appreciate it :-)

Right. It's my go on Swingball now, so I have to dash!

[whiskeryron]

Does she do the Tooth Fairy thing ( tooth under pillow fairy takes tooth & leaves a pound coin) ?. Explain that Fairy always does this when baby teeth actually FALL OUT, but this time because tooth hasn't fallen out Fairy has to be helped & will leave £2 to say thank you for your help.

WR.

[Old_Geezer]

As someone who doesn't have kids, seems to me that if she prefers to suffer then maybe that's the choice she has made, until she changes her mind. Not fair on the rest of you though.

[Connemmara]

Well Sparkles - maybe they don't knock children out but they sure knock adults our - cos I have been knocked via arm manys a time. Like 2sp I have had horrific times with the dentists all my life and am still suffering before I will go - last time was 2 and half years ago when I went private - the dentist charged me £200 for x-rays and different other hoohas - when it came to the work being done the following week I cancelled because of my phobia. Dentist said they would knock me out for 2and half hours to get all the work done. So here I am today still as nervous as that little girl of 5.

[nungate]

What can I say to help? If she won't take the calpol she won't take it and so she suffers! As I used to tell my daughter go on then be in pain I can't feel it - she was and still is what we call "thrawn" (stubborn and awkward) - she also learned the hard way that you have to cooperate or it will be painful. When she was six she had to have some teeth removed but since she's a diabetic it tends to complicate matters and it meant a hospital stay. If she's to have the tooth extracted, they'll probably put a drip in her hand (believe me that is the worst bit) they'll either do this at the time or in the ward and the anaesthetic is injected into the drip later - my daughter panicked when she saw the needle but was reassured that the needle wasn't going into her but into the drip, a few seconds later she was dead weight in my arms and was carried in to the room for the extraction. She was back in the ward in no time at all and less than an hour later she was asking for something to eat. You have to be the strong one and put on a very calm exterior, my daughter always responded to my apparent nonchalance - like when I told I was fine and felt nothing (inside I was churning as no one likes to see their child in distress) but as a parent we have to show them that we are calm and unworried. It's quite possible that if the pain in her tooth gets too much for her to bear she will accept some form if pain relief (failing that resort to bribery .... last resort though)

[Connemmara]

PS Baby-Sham - after going through a lot of effort in getting Calpol into her - is it really going to help?