Relationship

[Sassea]

Gentlemen: What is the best way to let a guy know you are more interested in a relationship than a friendship without scaring him???

[Sassea]

We both have a lot in common and we always have so much fun together... I am told he needs a push but how do you do that without scaring him... ? AND I certainly do not want to jeopardize our friendship but really would like to take it a step further, perhaps a few steps further down the road :-). Looking forward to your advise and Thank You in advance.

[Harry Nuttal]

This isn't an easy one - especially as we don't know all the odds and ends of your relationship. How old are you both? Is that a problem? Has he had one or two bad trips; have you, for that matter? Is there anybody else hpovering? In the absence of info on which to base a considered judgement, I'd suggest perhaps a third party, a mutual friend whom you can trust, to suggest something along the lines of "Sassea really fancies you, I reckon." See what response that gets. It might jjust come down to what I call the full-frontal approach. If that scares him off then I really don't think you would be missing out on much. Let us know how you get on.

[Sassea]

Thank you Harry Nuttal for your response. Yes I do have a friend that I can trust, whom is a mutual friend of ours, and she really would like to see us go forward and she is going to do her magic (so to speak). We are both adults, I am a young :-) 50 and he is 44. We both have been through a lot and I am a very positive person... Thanks again

[Harry Nuttal]

Hi Sassea. I'm a young 64 and, believe me, I've see a bit of life. It's when you get older that you realise that money, power, position count for nowt. The one thing you can't buy is time and no one beyond the first flush of youth should waste a second. You sound really sweet and positive and I've got my fingers crossed for you. Best of luck.

[Sassea]

Thanks Harry Nuttel. I'll keep you posted. You guys scare easy, and this guy is special to me, I want to do the right thing...so I thought when I discovered this link to put it out there and see the responses. Thanks again. If you have anymore advice - bring it on :-) All the best...

[jake-the-peg]

You could try turning up for a date in a wedding dress! - maybe not :c)

[Harry Nuttal]

Any more advice? Well, couple more thoughts. Have you tried a weekend away? Perhaps he's keen on sport - it's an ideal somewhere-to-aim-for. Let him make the arrangements; no doubt he'll consult you. "Oh, we needn't go to the expense of two rooms. We are grown ups." you can say, thereby hinting at romance and giving the distinct impression that you don't cob money away. Then just get sozzled together! And have a laugh. It's always worked for me. Cheers!

[Englishbird]

I'm in a very similar situation .... do you chase? do you walk away? I have no idea, I've been asking myself this a lot.

I got an invite through this morning for a party, 'Englishbird + 1' - aha I thought, perfect excuse :o) Get a friend who he doesn't know to invite you plus one, then you have an excuse to invite him, and you get him on his own .... and an excuse for that snog at the end of the night?

Above all I've decided just to carry on being me, getting on as well with him as I do, making him laugh and laughing with him. I'll make myself indispensable and then I'll disappear for a week. Sooner or later he has to realise he can't live without me in his life ...... surely ;o)

[Sassea]

Harry, we both do not drink but thanks for your input. As a matter of fact, we both went to a convention in OC just recently. Unbeknownst to me we were upgraded and it was a king size bed (reserved a double bed originally-because we are "friends")and he made it clear nicely that it should be a double which was fine w/me...and so it was changed. Truly fine with me because "that" would have been a little awkward for both of us. Too early for all of that right now. Anyway, its Valentines so Happy Valentines everyone... I have yet to hear from "him". This is frustrating... and yet this too shall pass. It would be nice though if he'd make the first move, yet like my friend says "He's slow" in that area.....ergo: I'm on this link for advice and curiousity.... Have fun LoveBirds...........