Your Opinion Please (Again)

[Connemmara]

As some of you may or may not know I suffer badly from Menieres attack and never know when an attack may occur.

Anyway at the mo 2 bros are probably dying - one from heart stuff and just got word about the other bro in Scotland has fallen probably for 100th time and was ambulanced into hospital but has got out.

He is a chronic alcoholic, won't listen to a word to the daughter who unfortunatley looks after him and calls her very bad words.

Anyway guys if he was to die I don't think I can make it to his funeral - even if it is next year - he is 70 and thinks he is a wee boy. This all adds to my anxiety.

[anneasquith]

conn. I don't think there is very much you can do about your brother in Scotland, if he chooses to continue drinking that's his choice, hard as it is to accept, at least you know his daughter is caring for him.

[ummmm]

I'm sorry to hear about your brothers but if you can't make it then you can't make it. He might not be on his death bed yet so there is no point fretting.

How long has he been a chronic alcoholic?

[Connemmara]

Most of his life

[Connemmara]

anne I do understand what you are saying - but it does look bad with no rep from here - understand you Ummmm too - not on his deathbed - how he isn't is beyond me.

[jacklee]

Sorry to hear your sad news, conn, - a bad year for both of us.
Best wishes for a brighter 2014.
Bless you.

[anneasquith]

conn, im sure you nieces/nephews will understand, keep in contact with them and if possible talk to your brother on the telephone. jacklee, I hope next year is better for you both.

[Mamyalynne]

Conne, hard as it is - you must put your own health first. He has always known what he was doing and won't change now, worrying about what is to be before it happens, will indeed add to your anxiety and is of course as you know never going to change a thing.

My heart goes out to you all the same.

[Barmaid]

Mamy is right.

Are you having any counselling for your anxiety? There is absolutely no point in working yourself up about something that hasnt happened yet and may not happen for a while.

And if you cant go to the funeral the world is not going to stop. Funerals are more for the living than for the dead.

[ummmm]

What about your other siblings?

[Connemmara]

as my friend always said part of my anxiety I worry worry so much about something that hasn't happened yet. Now, I have got myself into a state I have taken a bad nosebleed - haven't had these since I was 10. No harm to my brothers I may be on my own deathbed before them. Sorry for being maudlin. HI Jacklee - thanks for responding and of course to others.

[Connemmara]

they are dead apart from my sister - who deffo couldn't cope - I always was left with the responsibility.

[Connemmara]

there is so much to the story but I won't bore you - he has another daughter and son and his ex partner who live in Scotland who naturally enough don't bother with him as he wasn't in their lives growing up - my sister and I can't believe that this wee daughter took him in 7 years ago from London much to her regret now and she does have a little boy of 6. Horror movie I call it.

[grasscarp]

I think you need to sit back Connemmara. Sufficient unto the day is the evil theorof etc. Cope with each day the best you can. Dont take life too seriously as you are not going to get out of it alive. None of us know what is happening next and what is expected of us. Somehow whatever it is we do usually find the strength to cope.

[pixie373]

Conne, it sounds as though you are used to taking responsibility for everybody yourself and so it's hard to get out of the habit now. But you are all adults and you need to look after yourself now. Did you keep your appointment you were wondering about?
I wish you and your family all the best, but i think your hands are tied here and you should put yourself first for a change xx