TTT - I know you are being sarcastic, but seriously, you need to look at the facts involved here.
The sobriety test that tube drivers take is at a far lower level than that for car drivers, so - as is the union's contention here - it is possible to register a fail on the tube drivers' alcohol level test without being remotely intoxicated.
I believe, that the level is actually set at zero - so any alcohol content will register. The union's argument is that the driver involved is taking medicine for he diabetes, and that may be sufficient for a negative reading.
That is a long way from the spin the media are trying to make us see, which is a driver rolling in too drunk to stand up, and wanting to take a train out - that appears to be a long way from what is actually happening here.
The media can spin anything - as a long deceased Archbishop Of Canterbury found on his first trip to New York.
As he stepped off the plane, a microphone was thrust in his grace's face, and a voice asked him if he was going to see the strippers on Fifth Avenue?
"Are there strippers on Fifth Avenue?" enquired his grace, keen to take an interest in his host nation's entertainments - if only to be polite.
The following day's headline read "Archbishop steps off plane and asks if there are strippers on Fifth Avenue!!!!!"
Yes, it is what he said, but context is every bit as important as a soundbite.