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Naked

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marval | 17:04 Sun 31st May 2015 | Jokes
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My friend has been invited to a naked wedding.
He came within an inch of being best man.

I have a house in West Africa, but I haven't Benin for a while.

My dad is a former postman living in Germany
He's something of an ex Pat.

I had a night on the tiles last night.
I fell asleep on my scrabble board.

My mate has an extreme hatred for certain security software developers...
I'm sick of his Anti-Symantec views.

I went to a seminar, where the main speaker was this dairy farmer, who just went on and on about all the different things he did with his milk.
I wouldn't have missed my train if he had just condensed it a bit.

In a strange car accident yesterday I killed several Native American Indians;
I lost control of my car on the A1 and ploughed straight through the central reservation.

I was in Tesco's earlier, and I met a really stunning blonde man.
He had a great figure, and a beautiful smile, so I invited him back to mine to look at my stamp collection.
"Philately will get you nowhere", he said.

I stole a boomerang in this store today and stuffed it up my sleeve; the security guard caught me and threw me out of the shop 37 times.

My partner never trusts me with anything, especially when it comes
to the kids.
So I was surprised this morning when he asked me to drop them off at the nursery.
I thought they looked really nice next to the potted plants and the baby conifers.

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LOL, like them marval.
lol. The boomerang one amused me more than it should have done.

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