Can Any One Help Me Unpick This?

[sacha.86]

I've been single for a while and have recently decided I want to get married. A very hansom and well presented man - who seemed to be surrounded by good friends - approached me to tell me how well he'd been thinking of my son. I smiled said thank you, noticed a wedding ring on his finger and became overwhelmed by fear. He then walked away. I'm baffled by my trail of thought and by the sense of fear that overcame me. Can anyone help me unpick this or put some understanding next to these sorts of encounters?

[sacha.86]

You must have good understanding of language. I have never noticed, I grew up around alot of Arabic, maybe that has influenced my language style

[Retrochic]

So you fear speaking to men -even those in shops? Think you need to see your GP to get referred.

[Retrochic]

sacha My first language is French and it does not surprise me you have grown up around Arabic. Are your attitudes to men based on what you were told growing up in an Arabic environment?

[sacha.86]

I've got an appointment at the hospital in the morning about my back, I haven't a clue if it a male doctor or not I'm petrified

[sacha.86]

Still feeling a little hurt by someone I did want to marry, buy no there's no one I want to marry at present

[tonyav]

sacha.86
Question Author
I've got an appointment at the hospital in the morning about my back, I haven't a clue if it a male doctor or not I'm petrified


If it turns out it's a male doctor you could ask for a female nurse to be present perhaps.

[sacha.86]

I'm not sure, i think I fell into the trap of believing that men are superior to women. I only just recently realised that jelousy isn't a female only feeling

[Jackdaw33]

I see your point, Retro.

[sacha.86]

Yh your probably right about getting referred, will probably help. What did people do before the age of therapists?

[jourdain2]

What is it about the state of marriage that makes you want to enter into it before you have even met a man you could contemplate marrying? Marriage is something that gradually evolves as an option between two people. For it to be a happy one is not just a 'lifestyle choice'.

Seems odd to me. This chap was probably just being pleasant and anyway, he's married so it's a big warning 'hands off' sign that should be flashing up.

As Retrochic asked, is your involvement with Asian people colouring your attitudes? I find it had to envisage being 'petrified' in case I had a male doctor, no matter what I had to see a doctor for. I admit to a preference for a female radiologist when having a mammogram done, but that is because they understand how painful it can be and they are gentler than the males.

A doctor sees you as a case, a body, a problem to be solved/helped that's all. Please relax and lose the fear of the opposite sex - they're only humans, just like you. :)

[sacha.86]

Because to me it's a sign of commitment and a good attitude to start a relationship with.

[sacha.86]

Sigh

[pastafreak]

The OP is a long term member...why would this be a wind-up?

[Retrochic]

pastafreak it was some of the content of her previous posts that has stopped me replying any further as she is has said she is diagnosed Schizophrenic and a couple of recent posts leads me to believe she may be having an episode.. Apart from that -why should the longevity of a AB member preclude wind ups?

[pastafreak]

@ retrochic...Repeated "wind-ups" would be noticed and dealt with accordingly...or so I assume.
Ah...it looks as if your comment was removed.