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Groupie

People are now suing companies like Benson and Hedges

because smoking has caused them cancer, Nestle for chocolate that's made them fat, and more recently McDonald's because a coffee was served up too hot! So now I'm thinking... I wonder if I could sue...
18:43 Fri 06th Feb 20094 answers, last by Panic Button 19:22 Fri 06th Feb 2009
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With all this CCTV about!

I read a news report today saying that Britain is becoming a surveillance society and peoples democratic rights are being gradually eroded away. I would go into more detail, but there's a pigeon on my...
14:39 Fri 06th Feb 20093 answers, last by sandmaster 13:36 Tue 10th Feb 2009
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A guy crashed his motorcyle through the window of our local curry house yesterday.

A hospital spokes person announced that he is in a korma.
13:17 Fri 06th Feb 2009
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A man turns up at the hospital carrying a shoe box under his arm,

he goes up to a nurse and opens the box. Inside is a giant steaming turd. The nurse looks shocked and asks the man why he's bought the turd. "Because I need to see an optician," he says. The nurse...
19:03 Thu 05th Feb 20094 answers, last by leylander 20:37 Sun 08th Feb 2009
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I met a bloke in the pub last night and we got talking about gardening.

I was rather pleased when he offered to deliver a ton of horse manure free of charge, but was soon disappointed. Turns out it was a load of b*llsh*t.
14:50 Thu 05th Feb 2009
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Memory stick problem?

Hello on my digital camera (Sony Cybershot) When i turn it on i get the message Memory Stick Error, I remove the stick wipe it and all is OK until the next time i switch it on i get the same message....
18:20 Wed 04th Feb 20091 answer, last by ChuckFickens 23:26 Wed 04th Feb 2009
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If it wasn't for my mate Jim i wouldn't be by my computer tonight

I used to shag his missus on Monday nights until he caught us last week.
19:19 Mon 02nd Feb 2009
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Is this a good reason for rejection from a dating agency?

Sorry. Your application to join our match-making service has been rejected. You failed question #14: 'What do you most like in a woman?' 'My D*ck' was not an acceptable answer.
14:04 Mon 02nd Feb 20092 answers, last by gbradfield 20:29 Wed 04th Feb 2009
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A prostitute goes to the doctor

"doctor doctor i have 3 fannys" "Nope no way not possible" he says So the doctor has a look,and sure enough the hooker has 3 fannys,all in a row ... he tells her " im going to sew the two outer ones...
10:02 Fri 30th Jan 20094 answers, last by Bert 16:03 Thu 05th Feb 2009
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Mortar setting time

I have built two concrete block pillars and have embedded thread bar into the mortar between the blocks ( i have bent this to stop turning) and protruded them to hang 2" gate posts, How long should i...
20:01 Thu 29th Jan 20092 answers, last by Groupie 17:56 Sat 31st Jan 2009
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Thatcher is going to be buried at the bottom of a lake you know.

Or at least she will by the time everyone has stopped p*ssing on her grave.
20:32 Mon 26th Jan 2009
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Roger Daltrey singing soundtrack

Maybe with or without The Who, Something about a teenage waitress
19:33 Fri 23rd Jan 20093 answers, last by Groupie 11:04 Sat 24th Jan 2009
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" ERECTUS TROUSERIUS" or the trouser snake is the worlds most dangerous snake.

Its colour varies from pink to black. Its fangless, average length 5-6 inches (although some are said to reach 10 inches depending on honesty of its owner) Its normal habitat is the bedroom where it...
10:36 Fri 16th Jan 20092 answers, last by weeal 13:42 Sat 17th Jan 2009
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Find knocking pipes (plumbing)

There is a clanging sound when i or my nieghbour switch off a cold water tap or a toilet cistern fills. How can i identify where the problem is
09:37 Thu 15th Jan 20092 answers, last by Groupie 19:37 Thu 15th Jan 2009
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Viagra has just been released in powdered form -I put some in my tea today, it did nothing for my sex drive but......

It stopped my biscuits from going soft
12:28 Fri 02nd Jan 20093 answers, last by coffeeboy 16:07 Sat 03rd Jan 2009
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After watching

all the hundreds of tons of fireworks on the telly on new years eve ,in my excitement i forgot to turn off the standby button on the TV, hope i haven't increased my carbon footprint too much
19:28 Thu 01st Jan 20091 answer, last by wildwood 07:53 Fri 02nd Jan 2009
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My sister told me this

I work in a great office. As far as the lads are concerned, "harass" is still two words...
18:46 Mon 29th Dec 20082 answers, last by QueenOfAmber 12:16 Tue 30th Dec 2008
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Ladies DON'T read this

Me and my mates like to play a game when we're out on the ****. It's called: FAT GIRL RODEO. It's when you find the biggest woman in any particular bar and start dancing behind them. Then with your...
17:27 Mon 29th Dec 20088 answers, last by Groupie 09:53 Thu 01st Jan 2009
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Sadly, my wife isn't what she once was...

My girlfriend.
14:14 Sun 28th Dec 20084 answers, last by sqad617 18:17 Sun 28th Dec 2008
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What about this?

I read this article about how the internet is allowing people to get free music and movies illegally and such piracy is killing the respective industries.bolluks! We've all downloaded loads of pirated...
18:44 Sat 27th Dec 20086 answers, last by willowman 07:18 Tue 30th Dec 2008

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