One day in the jungle a chimpanzee invented some tools to eat his dinner. One tool was a flat stick sharpened along one edge, this he used to cut his food. The other was a stick with four smaller...
Ok having a discussion with my mates in wetherspoons yesterday (4 girls). Started talking about sex and basically my mate had just come back from holiday with her man, and they were going through a...
He's still in that bleeding house, getting to know the locals. And the narrative still revolves around the life histories of the Vangar family. Does anything happen in this bloody book? Is it worth...
A man checks into his hotel on a business trip and, feeling a bit lonely, he thought, I'll call one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab. He looked in...
Just wanted to sing the praises of Aldi hay fever tablets, they cost a fraction of the cost of branded tablets - not advertising as such, just wanted to give people a chance to save money. (Putting...
My parents restrict my freedom to the age of a 10 year old, I am not allowed to stay out at friends houses (never have been allowed). My mum texts me every hour to see where I am and what I am doing!...
I'm putting this in News because the Olympics is the biggest news right now. Most of the British competitors who've thus far failed to medal (this is an accepted verb now, it seems) have said things...
Good news! Duncer's solution worked. The ants have gone although I am keeping plenty of cheap washing up liquid handy in case they decide to come back. They may still be lurking. Duncer's solution was...
A guy tells his psychiatrist, “I always have this weird dream at night. I am locked in a room with a door on which there is a sign. I try to push it with all my strength, but no matter how hard...
I think it's spelt something like Clauyhaler? Management's gone on the wagon for reasons which I won't bore you with here and wants to try this stuff. Does anyone know anywhere in Bedfordshire that...
The wife and I were having a ride out in the country when we came across a turkey farm, as we were going by I said "hang on I'm sure that turkey had three legs" so I pulled in by the fence...
A son of a friend of mine says he got 69% in exams and if he had got 1% more to equal 70% it would have been classed as 1st Class honours. As 2nd class honours ranges from 60% to 69% would it be...