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marval

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marval

What?

What do you call a Pakistani Elvis impersonator? Amal Shukup....
22:54 Wed 01st Mar 20178 answers, last by marval 18:24 Thu 02nd Mar 2017
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marval

Our Vet

Our town vet once neutered fifty dogs in ten minutes. We call him the ace of spayeds....
18:51 Tue 28th Feb 20175 answers, last by Samjenko 15:53 Wed 01st Mar 2017
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marval

Genius

A dental hygienist had a family come in one day for their teeth to be cleaned. By the time she was ready for the father, he informed her she had a lot to live up to. His six-year-old daughter kept...
18:07 Mon 27th Feb 20175 answers, last by percy1946 21:24 Tue 28th Feb 2017
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marval

Another Japanese Joke

So there's this Japanese man watching a jazz band. In the interval he goes up to the guitarist and says "Can you play - jazz chord?" The guitarist says "Yeah, how about Cmaj9", and plays the chord....
13:11 Sun 26th Feb 20171 answer, last by Patsy33 14:58 Sun 26th Feb 2017
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marval

I Am

I am a Beekeeper. My friends say I'm a nightmare to play scrabble with....
18:40 Fri 24th Feb 201711 answers, last by Patsy33 22:08 Fri 24th Feb 2017
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marval

Another Seamstress

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?" The...
18:32 Mon 20th Feb 20171 answer, last by Patsy33 19:34 Mon 20th Feb 2017
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marval

Another Pint

A man walks into a bar. “Can I have a pint of less please?” he asks. “I’m sorry sir,” the barman replies, looking slightly puzzled. “I’ve not come across that one before, is it a...
17:17 Mon 20th Feb 20173 answers, last by joggerjayne 14:22 Tue 21st Feb 2017
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marval

My Dad Loves The Beatles And Has All But One Of The Original L.pmy Friend Records With Autographed Sleeves. I Think He Needs Help.

My friend loves the Beatles. He has all but one of the original L.P records with autographed sleeves. I think he needs Help....
22:51 Sun 19th Feb 201721 answers, last by marval 23:46 Sun 19th Feb 2017
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marval

Lost

Has anyone lost a large wad of twenty pound notes? . Wrapped in an elastic band? . Please get in touch as soon as possible. I have found the elastic band....
17:21 Sun 19th Feb 20176 answers, last by Arksided 19:11 Sun 19th Feb 2017
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marval

I Had

Two Irish lads Pat & Mick are drinking in a bar. Pat says to Mick "I had my way with that blonde lass that I met last night" Mick replies to him and says. "Will you be seeing her again later tonight?"...
19:49 Sat 18th Feb 20171 answer, last by Gizmonster 14:01 Sun 19th Feb 2017
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marval

Groan

A man is fishing and hooks a salmon, he reels it in and is just going to kill it for his dinner when the salmon looks at him and says, "Hey mate, don't kill me, I'm only a baby, I haven't swum the...
22:12 Wed 15th Feb 201717 answers, last by divebuddy 20:30 Thu 16th Feb 2017
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marval

I Bought

I bought a stock car to race with. It was all going well until it rained. I was left in a puddle of gravy....
17:28 Wed 15th Feb 20175 answers, last by kawanabe 10:30 Thu 16th Feb 2017
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marval

Have To

You really have to love eBay. I sold my homing pigeon eight times last month....
23:06 Tue 14th Feb 20177 answers, last by Patsy33 11:40 Wed 15th Feb 2017
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marval

What Do You Do?

I got chatting to a chinese man at a party last night. I asked him what he did for a living. He said "I'm a pirate." I said oh, you sail a ship? He said "No, I fry pranes."...
18:28 Tue 14th Feb 20173 answers, last by Patsy33 20:58 Tue 14th Feb 2017
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marval

I Have

I Have been struggling for weeks to think of a Fishing wordplay joke. I just need someone to throw me a line....
17:25 Tue 14th Feb 201713 answers, last by elliemay1 20:29 Tue 14th Feb 2017
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marval

I Didn't Like It

A sale representative stops at a small manufacturing plant. He presents a box of cigars to the manager as a gift. "No, thanks," says the plant manager. "I tried smoking a cigar once, but I didn't like...
15:22 Sun 12th Feb 20172 answers, last by Shaglene 11:52 Mon 13th Feb 2017
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marval

A Woman Buys A New Phone. Oops

A woman buys a new phone. She decides to surprise her husband who is seated on the sofa in the living room. She goes to the kitchen and calls her husband with the new number. She says, "Hello...
22:21 Sat 11th Feb 20175 answers, last by weecalf 03:28 Sun 12th Feb 2017
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marval

I Used

I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying."...
17:34 Sat 11th Feb 20174 answers, last by Patsy33 19:41 Sat 11th Feb 2017
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marval

I Thought

I thought he asked if I was interested in an orgy. Turns out he really said 4G. My apologies to the lad at the phone shop....
15:57 Sat 11th Feb 20171 answer, last by cupid04 18:51 Sun 19th Feb 2017

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