A man that was overseas decided to get his mother something special for her Birthday. He searched all over and just when he though that nothing was really suitable; he spotted a man with a very large...
A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a middle school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The very next...
I have just received an e-mail asking me to sign a petition, to get Costa Coffee to not provide free Copies of The Sun I personally think there are more important things to worry about. Or do you...
A man walks into a bar and orders six whiskies. He lines them up in a row and knocks back the first, third, and fifth glasses. Then he gets up to leave. “Don’t you want the others?” asks the...
Eric is sitting at the bar staring morosely into his beer. Tom walks in and sits down. After trying to start a conversation several times and getting only distracted grunts he asks Eric what the...
A blonde and a brunette were walking through an old churchyard from the 1700s. Among the tombstones was one dated around 1725 that had fresh flowers by it. The blonde said "I wonder who has been here...
A guy walks into a bar with his dog and says, "I'll have a Scotch and water and my dog would like a whiskey sour." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't allow animals in here." The dog replies, "Hey,...
A man was driving recklessly down the motorway one day and his girlfriend in the passenger seat was getting very upset. The man finally realised that she was not happy with his driving and said....
The newly-married husband came home from the office to find his young wife in floods of tears. "Darling, whatever is the matter?" he asked. "Sweetheart," she sobbed, "The most terrible thing has...
A visiting sheik from the Middle East is at a party in London. The food makes him thirsty and he sends his private aide to collect some water several times. He demands water for the third time but the...
Bernie was unfortunate enough to be hit by a van and ended up in the hospital. His best friend Morris came to visit him. Bernie struggles to tell Morris, "My wife Sadie visits me three times a day....
A woman was in court charged with wounding her husband. "But why did you stab him over a hundred times?" asked the judge. "Oh, your Honour," replied the defendant. "I didn't know how to switch off the...
The salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in the department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress. Finally to...
A young Jewish Mother walks her son to the school bus corner on his first day of kindergarten. "Behave, my bubaleh," she says. "Take good care of yourself and think about your Mother, tataleh!" "And...
The SAS, the Parachute Regiment and the Police decide to go on a survival weekend together to see who comes out on top. After some basic exercises the trainer tells them that their next objective is...
Police officers George and Mary, had been assigned to walk the beat. They had only been out a short while when Mary said, "Damn, I was running late this morning after my workout and after I showered,...
A native American walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand and is pulling a male buffalo with the other hand and says to the waiter, "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure chief, coming right up."...
Many years ago, a baker's assistant called Richard the Pourer, whose job it was to pour the dough mixture in the making of sausage rolls, noted that he was running low on one of the necessary spices....
I once bought a pair of shoes. One day while wearing them, I fell and broke my wrist. Some time later while wearing them, I slipped, fell, and broke my knee. Those shoes cost me an arm and a leg!...
