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McMouse

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McMouse

Beer contains female hormones

Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer...
10:11 Thu 02nd Apr 20092 answers, last by DingoDave 16:19 Thu 09th Apr 2009
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McMouse

Old Age

At a nursing home a group of OAP's were sitting around talking about all their ailments. "My arms have become so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one. "Yes, I know," said another. "My...
10:03 Thu 02nd Apr 20093 answers, last by Nannyjillx2 18:22 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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McMouse

When I die

I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
09:54 Thu 02nd Apr 20098 answers, last by sleepy1j 16:13 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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McMouse

Socrates Acadamy of Learning

Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you either hear or are about to repeat a rumour. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher...
09:51 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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McMouse

Bragging Rights

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids. The first guy said,...
17:25 Wed 01st Apr 20091 answer, last by marval 21:43 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

9 Words that Women Use!!!!!

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five...
17:19 Wed 01st Apr 20093 answers, last by crazycathy2 21:40 Fri 03rd Apr 2009
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McMouse

Oh dear!

Teenage girl went to her GP for a check-up. When sounding her chest he said "Big breaths". She replied "and I'm only thixteen"
10:47 Wed 01st Apr 20093 answers, last by Zacsmaster 17:26 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

Danger of Drugs

Two Asian heroin addicts have injected themselves with curry powder by mistake - both are intensive care. One has a dodgy tikka and the other one is in a korma.
10:28 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

Stop Press

News just in. Police in London have found a bomb outside a Mosque. They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
10:25 Wed 01st Apr 20092 answers, last by chelsea78 00:01 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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McMouse

The following question was asked in a recent poll:

'Are there too many immigrants in Britain?' > 21% Said: Yes > 17% Said: No > 62% Said: عهد الأمن...
17:01 Tue 31st Mar 20099 answers, last by jake-the-peg 09:42 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

Victoria Police are Recruiting

A bloke applies for a job with the Victoria police, Inspector says "These are the best qualifications I've ever seen. Just one further test : Take this gun, go out, and shoot 6 Abo's, 6 Muslim's & a...
16:52 Tue 31st Mar 20093 answers, last by squarebear 10:59 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

Wish I could think so quickly. . . .

A man boarded plane with 6 kids. After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, 'Are all of those kids yours?' He replied, 'No. I work...
16:49 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

Voted Best Joke in Ireland

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life!, between the legs of me wife!" That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home and...
15:41 Tue 31st Mar 20091 answer, last by squarebear 16:02 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

Choking to Death

Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whisky, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. And, after a...
15:32 Tue 31st Mar 20095 answers, last by dennisb66 17:41 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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McMouse

Said to be true

BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE AND PROBABLY THE CENTURY. A Charlotte, NC lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, and then insured them against fire, among other things. Within...
15:29 Tue 31st Mar 20092 answers, last by squarebear 15:43 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

The Lady Sneezer

A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane. The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat. The man...
14:36 Tue 31st Mar 20091 answer, last by marval 16:15 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

I know the feeling

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly,...
12:48 Tue 31st Mar 20092 answers, last by marval 16:17 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

Tuesday

Three old guys are out walking. First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!' Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer.'
10:35 Tue 31st Mar 20092 answers, last by legendis.god 10:39 Tue 31st Mar 2009
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McMouse

Senior Moment

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a...
10:28 Tue 31st Mar 20094 answers, last by Beatrice35 08:14 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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McMouse

The Scotsman & The Dentist

A Scotsman phones a dentist to enquire about the cost for a tooth extraction. "?85 for an extraction, sir" the dentist replied. "?85!!! Huv ye no'got anythin' cheaper?" "That's the normal charge,"...
17:40 Mon 30th Mar 2009

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