Lady Janine was the third child born to the 24th Earl of Answerbank Under the Wold. She was raised by a succession of nannies until the age of seven when she was dispatched to boarding school. The...
When Craft was born, her parents, Mr and Mrs Petulengro, had decided to name her Thumbelina. Then Mrs Petulengro was idly glancing through her medical notes the midwife had left on the bed when she...
If you are thinking of having lip filler injected, save your money. Simply go for a swim in the North Sea in a swarm of jellyfish, and hey presto, a "trout pout" for free! (This tip is...
Sunny-Dave was one of 15 children born to a mother who had an obsession with the actor David Niven. Despite protests from her husband, she insisted on giving all 15 children the name David. Her...
Yesterday I spent the day once again minding my friend's handbag shop while she went to the wholesalers. A customer I was chatting to said she'd been in the previous week and said "Your mother...
Murraymints was born in a tenement in the Gorbals district of Glasgow. From an early age she knew she was destined for fame but having no apparent talents she didn't know in which direction fame lay....
You mentioned your dad knew the Krays and you have friends in low places in real life? I have a little job for you to arrange. It involves concrete foundations at the base of motorway bridges. The...
Towie was born into criminal royalty. Her parents held many awards and glittering prizes including Best Shoplifter (1955), Best Armed Robber (1960), Best Car Thief (1962) and others too numerous to...
From an early age the young Mick Talbot had a habit of developing obsessions which stayed with him for life. After receiving a postcard from a distant relative who had emigrated to the wilds of...
This morning I spoke to PALS who put me on to the patient transport service itself. Given the circumstances, Mr O IS eligible to have transport provided. A massive thank you to SunnyDave for providing...
Does anyone know the criteria for eligibility? It can't be down to benefits as I have a wealthy friend in West Yorkshire who is attending a hospital in Sheffield and patient transport (a taxi) is...
Tonyav was conceived (with a degree of contortion and inventiveness) on the back seat of a Citroen 2CV, so his parents decided to name him Antoine Avec Voiture. His name lasted until his first day at...
I am so ashamed to admit this, but here goes. I've bought a new laptop and for the first time ever I have bookmarked several pages of interest. My question is, how do I retrieve the bookmarked pages?...
Pretend to be another AB'er who has joined a dating agency and let's see if we can guess who the AB'er is. I'll start the ball rolling. Female, divorced, small but perfectly formed with own wetroom...
I posted this a couple of years ago but no harm in airing it again. Invent the most ridiculous country & western song title you can. Here are some real examples for inspiration:...
I went to PC World this afternoon, knowing exactly which laptop I wanted. The first hurdle to overcome was to try and find a sales assistant. Two caught my eye and moved off sharpish. Assistant no. 3...
