An artist's model showed up late and sneezing. "I don't feel like modelling today, I hab a code" she sniffled. "Yes, that's okay, my hands are sore anyway" said the sculptor. "Just rest, and I'll make...
Paddy rang the Ad Mag to see how much to put in an item to sell. The lady on the other end of phone told him it was 50p an inch. Paddy said F*** that, I can't afford that! The lady asked him what he...
Had it done today at about 12pm. With sedation and throat spray! If nervous like me, I'd recommend it. Anyway, turns out I have Gastritis and Hiatus Hernia. I'm not too sure what Hiatus Hernia...
Harry is visiting his grandma. She complains about the high cost of living. "When I was a girl, you could go out with a shilling and come back home with a dozen eggs, two pints of milk, a pound of...
Waiter!" shouted the furious diner, "How dare
you serve me this!
There's a damn TWIG in my soup!"
"My
apologies," said the waiter. "I'll inform the branch
manager."...
I can't seem to find a good banana anywhere lately. I usually get mine from Tesco or Sainsburys. Yesterday I bought a small bag from Co- op, as the loose ones looked horrible. They looked ok in bag...
My friend's neighbour was arrested for annoying his other neighbours with extremely loud music by Englebert Humperdinck. My friend seen the neighbour earlier and asked him of the outcome. He said,...
I'm having a gastroscopy in 10 days time, and I'm getting anxious about it. I've been asked whether I'd like to be sedated or just have the throat numbed. If any of you have had this procedure, could...
