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richardjhoop

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McMouse

Two deaf lesbians

walking down the road with their hands in each others knickers. What are they doing? Lip reading.
11:28 Thu 30th Apr 20093 answers, last by Reincarnated 16:27 Thu 30th Apr 2009
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missprim

The buck stops here

I know what this means but where did this saying come from?
01:37 Sun 12th Apr 20093 answers, last by richardjhoop 23:08 Wed 15th Apr 2009
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lindylou16

Ha Ha Hee Hee

An English teacher spots a boy staring out the window and calls out a question, " You boy! Give me two pronouns." The startled boy looks round and says, " Who? Me?"
18:38 Thu 02nd Apr 20094 answers, last by richardjhoop 18:48 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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chrisrob

Not a pun - just good clean fun

A new pastor was visiting the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious someone was at home but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. He took out a card and wrote,...
11:56 Thu 02nd Apr 20094 answers, last by Nannyjillx2 18:50 Thu 02nd Apr 2009
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crisgal

old song mother bathing a baby

does anyone know what it is? I only know bits: he was a delicate mite...........the mother was poor, the baby was thin........... not much to go on i know!
16:35 Thu 02nd Apr 20098 answers, last by Trotboy 10:46 Sun 07th Jun 2009
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McMouse

9 Words that Women Use!!!!!

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five...
17:19 Wed 01st Apr 20093 answers, last by crazycathy2 21:40 Fri 03rd Apr 2009
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chrisrob

News from the wire:

An accumulator is feeling run down. It's quite shocking really: he used to be a bright spark until the powers that be charged him with battery and put him in a cell, despite putting up resistance. But...
09:43 Mon 30th Mar 20097 answers, last by chrisrob 09:00 Wed 01st Apr 2009
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SLINKYKATE

jade goodie

is appearing on t v in april,she signed up for most haunted live?
16:16 Thu 26th Mar 200927 answers, last by perigra 20:36 Fri 27th Mar 2009
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McMouse

Barrack Obama is visiting a Glasgow hospital

He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness, He greets one. The patient replies: Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o the puddin race, Aboon them a ye...
17:15 Tue 24th Mar 200911 answers, last by whiskeryron 11:02 Sun 29th Mar 2009
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chrisrob

The chief of the small African tribe

always welcomed important visitors from his solid wooden throne. However, he never liked using the same one twice so had a new one made for each occasion. Because they were too good to be thrown away,...
09:10 Wed 25th Mar 20091 answer, last by richardjhoop 18:26 Wed 25th Mar 2009
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chrisrob

A pair of shoes

How do you know when your shoes are on their last legs? When they're past heeling or when their soles have departed. > > > > > > Did you hear of the Dutchman who designed the blow up...
09:20 Sun 22nd Mar 20092 answers, last by richardjhoop 09:38 Sun 22nd Mar 2009
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BillySugger

Josef Frietzel

Just heard on the news he's going to get a short sentence . Fair enough , he's got a big family to look after
12:29 Wed 18th Mar 200910 answers, last by richardjhoop 17:32 Thu 19th Mar 2009
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Benjiman

Toilet Signs

On the door of a public toilet it usually says Mens or Womens. My grammer isn't great but shouldn't there be an apostrophe between the n and s since the toilets are belonging to this gender? So the...
23:57 Sun 15th Mar 200912 answers, last by Poppetchops 09:49 Thu 26th Mar 2009
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richardjhoop

Not punny (Part 1)

A man went to the doctor & said "Every time I pass wind it makes a funny noise." The doctor said "It's supposed to." The patient continued "No, not that kind of funny noise." "Well what sort of funny...
18:55 Mon 09th Mar 20094 answers, last by richardjhoop 22:44 Mon 09th Mar 2009
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lindylou16

This made me smile

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.
11:54 Thu 19th Feb 20093 answers, last by Mortartube 12:06 Fri 20th Feb 2009
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Steve.5

A1970s dance

I was invited to a 70s dance in Birmingham last Saturday. I forgot to pack a tie, so I went into a shop in New Strret & said to the counterperson "I would like a kipper tie" to which she replied...
20:06 Mon 02nd Feb 20094 answers, last by Seafarer1966 12:39 Thu 05th Feb 2009
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Groupie

A prostitute goes to the doctor

"doctor doctor i have 3 fannys" "Nope no way not possible" he says So the doctor has a look,and sure enough the hooker has 3 fannys,all in a row ... he tells her " im going to sew the two outer ones...
10:02 Fri 30th Jan 20094 answers, last by Bert 16:03 Thu 05th Feb 2009
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tonyav

pharmacy notification !!!

with immediate effect viagra will only be able to be sold under its chemical name, if needed please ask for mycoxaflopin. thank you.
16:02 Thu 29th Jan 20091 answer, last by richardjhoop 17:40 Sun 01st Feb 2009
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richardjhoop

Out of the mouths of.....

A Primary Teacher explains to her class that she is a Liverpool fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they too are Liverpool fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one...
21:10 Thu 22nd Jan 20092 answers, last by richardjhoop 10:38 Mon 26th Jan 2009
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richardjhoop

Holy smoke

A couple wanted to join the church. The vicar told them, "We have a special requirement for new member couples. You must abstain from sex for one entire month." The couple agreed, but after two and a...
21:16 Thu 22nd Jan 20092 answers, last by richardjhoop 22:19 Thu 22nd Jan 2009

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