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wizard69

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wizard69

cemetery

I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a relative's grave. As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a coffin... 3 hours later and they're still walking...
13:44 Wed 24th Oct 20074 answers, last by squarebear 15:53 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

stevie

Stevie Wonder is being interviewed. The interviewer asks "So, Stevie, how do you cope with being blind?" Stevie replies, "It's OK. At least I'm not black."
13:42 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

two women

Two old women sitting in a cafe. Margaret says to Ethel, "Did you come on the bus?" Ethel replies, "Yeah, but I made it look like an asthma attack".
13:40 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

noddy

Why does Noddy have bells on his hat? Because he's a c*nt.
13:38 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

deaf and dumb

What do you do after raping a blind, deaf and dumb girl? Break her fingers so she can't tell anyone.
13:32 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

jews

What runs along walls and kills Jews? Gas Pipes.
13:30 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

little jonny

Little Jonny goes into school after being absent the previous day. His teacher demands, "Where were you yesterday?" "I'm sorry Miss, my dad got burnt" replies Jonny. "Oh,I'm sorry, I hope it wasn't...
13:29 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

stopped

I stopped a woman from being raped last night. I stayed in.
13:27 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

Barrymore

Why doesn't Michael Barrymore have any ashtrays? He puts his fags out in the pool.
13:24 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

scream

How do you make your girlfriend scream at the end of sex? Wipe your d!ck on the curtains!!
13:21 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

pmt

What's the difference between PMT and BSE? One attacks the cow's brain and sends it f*cking mental, and the other is some kind of agricultural problem
13:17 Wed 24th Oct 20072 answers, last by wizard69 13:26 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

samaritans

I phoned the Islamic Samaritans today. When I said I was feeling suicidal they got all excited and asked if I knew how to fly a plane.
13:15 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

fastest

What's the fastest thing on land? Stevie Wonder's speedboat!
13:12 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

mecca

200 muslims have been killed on their way to mecca. I f*cking love bingo!
13:11 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

8 legs

What has eight legs and makes women scream? Gang rape!
13:08 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

loaf

I said to the wife, "I thought I saw your name on a loaf of bread today , but when I looked again it said 'Thick Cut' "
13:06 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

smarties

whats the difference between smarties and muslims? Smarties dont blow up in the tube.
13:01 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

chat up line

Heres a chat up line that will ensure success with the ladies: 'Don't let this rape turn into a murder'
12:30 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

10 whiskies

A man walks into a bar and says to the barman "Line me up ten whiskies" So the barman lines them up and the man gulps them down one after another. "Jeez" says the barman "What are you celebrating...
12:28 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

essex girl

Essex girl in bed with her boyfriend says,'How dare you call me a slapper! Get out of my bed right now, and you can take all your ******* mates with you too!
12:25 Wed 24th Oct 2007

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