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wizard69

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wizard69

drink driver

A bloke is driving happily along in his car with his girlfriend when he's pulled over by the police. The police officer approaches him and asks, "Have you been drinking Sir?" "No. Why?" replies the...
12:19 Wed 24th Oct 20071 answer, last by China Doll 12:21 Wed 24th Oct 2007
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wizard69

jewish kids

Where do you send jewish kids with A.D.D.? To Concentration camps
17:23 Sun 21st Oct 20079 answers, last by Louisa 69 22:00 Tue 23rd Oct 2007
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wizard69

chatting

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe strip chatting over a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping through pictures and they start reminiscing....
17:21 Sun 21st Oct 20077 answers, last by its_me_baby 21:23 Tue 23rd Oct 2007
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wizard69

nappies

A woman visits her doctor complaining of a strange feeling in her lower stomach. The doctor examines her and states; "Well, I can tell you that you'll need to be buying lots of nappies in about nine...
17:15 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

doctor

Doctor: It's bad news, you have Cancer and Alzheimer's. Patient: Oh well, it could be worse - at least I don't have Cancer.
17:14 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

airport

Liverpool airport has been shut for the past 8 hours due to a "suspicious car". Apparently it had tax, insurance and the radio was still in it.
17:12 Sun 21st Oct 20072 answers, last by dolly pond 21:14 Tue 23rd Oct 2007
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wizard69

asylum seeker

Asylum seeker at the side of the road eating grass. Man pulls up in his car and says "Hey! Don't eat that. Come home with me and I'll feed you." The asylum seeker replies "I have 4 wives and 12 kids,...
17:10 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

star treck

Why are there no Muslims in Star Trek? It's set in an ideal future.
17:07 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

pub

The new barman in the pub is black, so i said to him "Beer please, n!gger". He hit the roof and said "Why don't we swap places, let's see how you like it". So i went round the bar, he walked out then...
17:05 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

survey

A psychology student is conducting a survey to study the masturbatory habits of males. She approaches the first man, and says "Excuse me sir, I'm conducting a survey, and would like to know: what do...
17:01 Sun 21st Oct 20071 answer, last by squarebear 09:43 Mon 22nd Oct 2007
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wizard69

mole

A bloke goes into the doctors and says, "I've got a mole on my d!ck, can you remove it please?" So the chap pulls his trousers and pants down, and the doc says, "Yes sir, I can remove that mole... but...
16:59 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

check up

I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up, She said I have to stop w@nking, When I asked why, she said "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
16:54 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

little boy

I was walking along a high cliff one day and saw a little boy, all alone. He was crying. I asked him, "Son, what are you doing up here all alone?" He replied, with tears in his eyes, "My mum's down...
16:52 Sun 21st Oct 20072 answers, last by squarebear 10:25 Mon 22nd Oct 2007
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wizard69

blacksmith

I went for a job interview as a Blacksmith yesterday, he said "Have you ever shoed a horse?" I said "No, but I've told a donkey to f*ck off."
16:50 Sun 21st Oct 20071 answer, last by squarebear 09:43 Mon 22nd Oct 2007
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wizard69

parking spaces

Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are gone. So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you stick it in a disabled one.
16:42 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

cash machine

I was at a cash machine when an old lady came up to me and asked to check her balance. So I pushed her over.
16:35 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

cruises

Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again!
16:30 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

spot

I had the most rewarding sh@g in my life last night with an 18 year old p@ki. whilst i was f*cking her i rubbed the dot from off her forehead and won a car.
16:18 Sun 21st Oct 2007
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wizard69

red spot

How do you get rid of the red spot on a ****'s head? Switch off the laser-sight on your gun.
16:07 Sun 21st Oct 20071 answer, last by wizard69 16:12 Sun 21st Oct 2007

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