sterilisation

[bookboo]

So, I'm 31 and I have a beautiful 4 year old son who was very much planned. Since he was born I knew that I never wanted to have another. Suffice to say that I am certain and my husband is supporting that decision. We will however consider adoption in the years following the completion of my degree as it is something we have talked about and would mutually like to do. My son is a content little boy who has a great deal of interaction with other children, particularly his cousin of the same age.

So anyway, from a creation point of view I am certain about sterilisation. I have tried the pill, implant and coil and none of which have been successful for different reasons, so this strengthens my decision. I am not a particularly religious person, however my only apprehension shall we say, is that this is an action that will be effectively interfering with nature. Does that make sense?

[ummmm]

Isn't the pill/implant/coil interfering with nature?

[Old_Geezer]

Every operation is interfering with nature. It is to overcome nature's less pleasant outcomes that we meddle in medicine.

[bookbinder]

Your husband could have a vasectomy. That might be acceptable to both of you.

[EcclesCake]

I agree with Ummm, you've already been interfering with nature so how would sterilisation be any different?

I believe that male sterilisation is a more straightforward procedure though, maybe something to consider.

[bookboo]

Oh yes, sorry, your right, but being a surgical procedure which will actually change my body physically it just feels like it would change the course of nature or something

[ummmm]

Get hubby to have the snip.

Sterilization is not always standard on the NHS anymore.

[bookboo]

Thanks, but he wont do it.

[bookboo]

What are your thoughts on it, I mean would you?

[ummmm]

Would I? No...

I did go to when I was 28 but the doctor refused. I'm glad I didn't, or he didn't. I have a new partner now and we have options. Not saying I will have another baby...but I have the choice. When I was 28 I didn't think I'd want the choice.

[rockyracoon]

My husband had the snip, it took a while to get him to agree, but in the end he realised that it would make his life easier and he relented.

[bednobs]

doesn't make all that much sense to me bookboo. As the others have said, if that's the way you feel, you've already been "interfering with nature"

[Traci66]

I was sterilised at 25, I knew I did not want any more children, it is not something I have ever regretted. Saying that, if you are not absolutely certain, then don't do it.

[EcclesCake]

It doesn't sound to me like you are ready to make this decision.

Why won't your partner have the snip?

[jno]

this is a horrible thing to say, but what if something were to happen to your little boy? Are you sure you wouldn't want to try again?

I'm also not quite sure why it has to be you and not your husband (or both of you). Or even why it has to be you who's using contraception. What's wrong with condoms?

I don't think it's interfering with nature, any more than having a tumour removed would be - that's what surgery is for.

[cazzz1975]

you can never be certain how your feelings may change in years to come, in 5 years people's ideas and plans can change a lot, at your age I would probably wait.

[bookboo]

Thanks all. My husband wouldn't have it done because it has always been me that didn't want another, he has only recently supported the decision. It will take further consideration I agree, but after 4 years I still feel the same. Anyway, thank for your feedback, I will have a chat with my doc.

[cazzz1975]

I agree with your husband, he shouldn't be forced to become infertile because you no longer want another child. good luck with your GP

[ummmm]

Just remember...they might not do it on the NHS if you are a healthy female.

Like jno says, they do ask that question. They also question your relationship.

[cathfromsaron]

i have been 'sorted' and most ecrtainly feel that it is safer than the coil etc!

plus, why don't you look into fostering?

they need loving people to make a difference!

[woofgang]

Had you thought that if your husband is only "supporting your decision" he might regret and it would finish the relationship?