empty nest syndrome

[slinky.kate]

my son is leaving me,he applied for a job in dundee and got it,he says its such a good offer he cant refuse,i will have to let him go sometime i suppose after all he is 25,has a girlfriend,am i an over possessive mother???,he has been brilliant with me since i took that bleed on my brain,he has really been there and takes me everywhere i want,i do have another son,he has his own place,but he will pop in more often he says,how did yous feel and cope when your kids flew the nest.

[Traci66]

I'm still waiting Kate, in fact I've now inherited grandchildren and they are here a lot, this week off though, they are all away and I am loving the peace and quiet and not being at everyone's beck and call.

[ummmm]

It's only my daughter that has flown the nest. Heart wrenching at first...you get used to it.

My boys are staying forever....

[slinky.kate]

umm i thought mine was staying forever as well,mind you he says he is coming back weekends and bringing his washing.

[maggiebee]

Hi Kate, I live in Dundee - is it very far from where you live? My kids flew the nest many years ago and I love when they all visit. However, I relish the peace and quiet when they go home. Will take a bit of adjustment to begin with, but I read once that if you want to keep them close you must let them spread their wings - they'll always return.

[woofgang]

I have no kids and am widowed too....you just pick yourself up and make your own life......

[slinky.kate]

hi maggiebee,he is looking for digs can you put him up?????(ha ha)he is going to work for the council(science technician)so you will know where he's going,we live in glasgow about an hour or so drive.

[slinky.kate]

not only is he going he's taking the dog because i cant take him out a walk,i love that dog.

[Jemisa]

"How did you feel & cope"

I felt Freeee & coped really well. I love it when they come to visit and stay,but I also love it when they go back to their own homes. Ahhhh!!

Am I heartless?? I love 'em all to bits tho.

Jem

[slinky.kate]

i think its i'm a bit nervous on my own in case i fall,i always had someone there since i took ill,i am sure i can cope fine though,thinking ,the house will be tidier,not so much cooking and cleaning,no dog hairs,no falling over his trainers,BUT if i go out i will need to get a taxi or i can use the dial a bus.

[WELSHYORKIE]

Sylvia had a hard time getting used to the 2 boys leaving, took about 2 months to adjust to a different routine. 12 months later one returned home after a failed relationship and we both found it harder to adjust to him coming home and upsetting all our routines

[slinky.kate]

i think i might depend on them a little to much.

[lcg]

i'm feeling particularly miserable, too. my son is 19, second yr of uni (although he still lives here) and he's just bought a ruddy motorbike. now worrying 24/7 and i feel him slipping away.....it's a strange feeling x

[funnygirl]

It is hard, especially when you go shopping and you realise that you're only food shopping for 2!!

[slinky.kate]

lcg ,a motorbike would worry me to .but i'm sure he will be fine

[slinky.kate]

funnygirl i wont have to go shopping for the next year,my freezer and chest freezer is full,i am going to give some of the food away to my pal,salmon and duck breasts,i am not to keen on them and he has gone vegeterian on me

[EvianBaby]

Well at the age of 28 I finally moved out of my Dads in May. I think he does get lonely sometimes but I think he'd hate it if I moved back in (so would I). And he seems to be enjoying his (late) midlife crisis.

[Jemisa]

Slinky, Your circumses are different to mine my H and I have got each other.
If you've a prob getting about can't you get yourself an electric mini mobility scooter? I find mine is a boon without a car & for longer runs yes 'Dial-a-ride'
Good Luck.

Jem

[Dee Sa]

the worst thing was I would forget when getting the weekly shop and get loads of food in and only me to eat it.
If you are not too far away he will bring his washing home, sons always do.
Did you see that "joke" doing the e mail rounds its the washing instructions on a label of a jumper and after the instructions it says "or ask your mother to do it for you ".
Hope things go well kate.

[Mosaic]

Kate - the job of a parent is to equip them to walk away.
They have to go.
They probably (usually) come back, to visit, to stay.
But their lives are not our lives even though we started it all.
You can visit Dundee and Dundee can visit you.
Technology is brilliant - you can skype every day for free if you want, and guess what, you're in the same time zone so it's not like there's a lot of fiddling to make sure who's awake and who's asleep.