Self Harm

[LadyOfQuestions]

I kinda need help. I have has so many ups and downs in life. I have had boys annoying me. I have had boys talking to me (when I was about 13) about boys parts! ewww! and I have had adoption. I self harm myself and now people stare at me and ask me about the cuts up my arm. most know what it is but I don't know how to control the fact that more and more people find out each day!

[Old_Geezer]

That folk are finding out is not your problem, your problem is that you feel a need to do this at all. Talk to your GP. Talk to your mum may help too.

[boxtops]

Lady, perhaps this is why your mum and her boyfriend are keeping an eye on you then, coming into your room - to try to stop you doing that. What does your mum say about this?

[LadyOfQuestions]

they don't know about the self harm. she hasn't said anything even if she has seen because she will come into my room in the mornings if I don't get up to shake me. she hasn't come and talked to me about it ever

[Mamyalynne]

You are unusual in the fact that most self harmers cut and cover up - you seem to want people to know.


Get help!!

[LadyOfQuestions]

I don't but its obvious on my arm and I over heat very quickly. I did the stupid thing of constantly cutting my arm and now marks on my arm are obvious. and the last time I kept my school jumper on all day I fainted halfway through the day! ever since I hardly ever where my jumper. I just cut in the wrong place. and all the girls stare at each other when getting changed. they look at my arms all the time

[ClaryS]

So at what age were you adopted? Do you live in the UK? From some of the language you use I would guess you live in the USA?

[Mamyalynne]

Get help, ask your head of year at school for guidance.

[boxtops]

You need to show your mum these posts on AB - you really do.

[LadyOfQuestions]

she would nag me if she saw any of this! and say why am I going on these sights anyway coz family is constantly being talked to by social services. I live in wales. I kinda hate it here. adopted at the age of about 3. taken away from parents at 2. adoptive parents split up at about 8 an moved to wales in time for year 4. self harm started a year ago

[Baby_Sham]

Blimey, you're 'brave'! I go to great lengths to cover up my arms, even wearing a long-sleeved top to the gym - which is not in the least bit comfortable. I also make sure I've ALWAYS got a cardigan on when at home. That would be my worst nightmare actually, people 'finding out'.

With regards to controlling how more and more people find out, this will sound stupid, but maybe just cover up?

As a side note, really think about what you're doing. Think about when you're older and have children, and have to explain to them why you have scars all over your arms.
That's the main thought that's stopping me from doing it at the moment, and also the realisation that it doesn't actually achieve ANYTHING!

You do sound like you want people to know. If that's the case, please go to your doctor, and they will refer you to someone who can help.
Best of luck :)

[LadyOfQuestions]

I do have counselling at school and mum treats me like a baby and goes with me practically everywhere. I wouldn't be able to talk to a doctor on my own properly. I will ask next time coz having a blood test on Halloween. I will keep ya updated and anything anyone unsure about just comment and I will explain

[Peter Pedant]

ahhh - well if you have counselling at school -
in a quiet moment
you can raise the rather disturbing behaviour of your mum's new boy friend that you have raised this pm in another thread.

[Baby_Sham]

If you're having a blood test, you'll have no choice. The nurse will see it and start probing you.

I'm not really the best person to give advice on this subject, but I will tell you one thing I've learnt, talking is the most powerful tool you can have.
I have never been one to 'open up' to people, but since I've started being open and honest with a couple of people, it's really really helped. You don't feel so alone :)

[ck1]

You should definitely be prepared to talk to the nurse about it, will be a great opportunity to get some help and they might not mention it even if they see it so be brave and talk to her about it

[LadyOfQuestions]

well. counciling stoped for the moment coz apparently home is better. wrong and also thanks for your feedback people! :)

[Peter Pedant]

well

LOQ: I do have counselling at school
advice well tell the counsellor....
LOQ: well. counciling stoped for the moment

so she does and she doesnt have counselling - no wonder ABers cant keep up with it

[LadyOfQuestions]

I told my councillor and now my mum knows. its all good.ive got a session and I should be fine