10+1 Things Not To Say To A Policeman
I can't reach my licence unless you hold my beer.
Hey, is that a 9mm? That's nothing compared to this 44 magnum.
Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.
Sorry officer, I didn't realise my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
I was going to be a policeman, but I decided to finish secondary school instead.
What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.
Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriends night stand.
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes I know there is no other car around, that's how far they are ahead of me.
Is it true that people become policemen or women because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?
Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the accelerator forcing me to speed out of control.
And a true story that did work....friend in Philadelphia was pulled over at 2 in the morning, on the way back home from his gf's.....
"Sir, have you been drinking?"
"No Officer."
"I can smell beer on your breath."
"That;s my girlfriend that you are smelling, Officer."
One stunned police officer and the friend allowed to go on his way.....