Feeling really low..

[kat2206]

Why do I let my mother upset me?

My OH took her to the train station on Friday as she was going on holiday and all she did in the car was slate me down, slate down my sons and then ask my OH if he really was sure that he wanted to marry me and that she isnt sure she's coming to the wedding now either.

We have always had a strained relationship but why does she feel the need to constantly belittle me and slate me at every opportunity, it has really upset me that she can still treat me this way after all I have forgiven her for her past mistakes.

I just feel like cutting people out of my life now that has a negative impact on my life, I just can't be doing with this hurt and upset all the time.

[divegirl]

So don't see her any more! My Mum was just the same so I cut her out of my life....simple really!

Lisa x

[Mosaic]

So like mine.....does she tell lies about you as well? You have my sympathy. After many years of wasted attempts to be nice, I simply started rolling about laughing when she started. You will never change her and she will continue doing this even if you aren't upset by it. As others have said, make the minimum effort to build your life around her - you have your life to lead and if she's screwed up hers being bitter and twisted it's not your fault.

[DTCwordfan]

Jealousy

Ignore her and cherish your love and support of your OH - hopefully he told her what plane to go go and get on.

Life goes on - be civil to her though, no more, until you get an apology or appreciation out of her.

[DTCwordfan]

And he probably feels sick about it too.......

[BAKERS DOZEN]

You have a new life ahead of you so go ahead and enjoy it. If it were me I would get married while she was on holiday and you can still have a great party for your friends afterwards. She sounds as if she wants to be in control so just ignore her. Life is too short to put up with people like her. I cut both my parents out of my life about twenty five years ago and have never been happier.

[notasyoungasiwas]

It's so sad that your mum is like that - silly woman doesn't know what she's missing. You don't need all the aggro and I agree with the other posts. Good luck kat.

[TWR]

Family can be really hurtful at times, been there seen the video, there is no way I would let this woman back into you life / house, if she phones tell her to sod off & put the phone down, If you fail to help yourself by not standing up to her, then I think it's a waste of time asking for advise. by the way, who is picking her up? If she rings get your OH to tell her to get a taxi. I'm a soft sod at heart but enough is enough with some people.

[maggiebee]

I would tell her exactly how her comments make you feel and that if she is not willing to change then it's the parting of the ways.

[joggerjayne]

Oh, Kat ... that's horrid.

I wonder, with relatives ...

Do you try to put up with it, and tough it out, in the hope that, one day, they will suddenly realise how amazing you have been all their life?

[sherrardk]

My mother used to be like that. When I visited when I was at uni and in my early twenties she wouldn't be happy until I was in tears. I never, ever said how I felt or what I thought of her as I didn't want to upset her (?), and knew that once the words were out you can't take them back. As the years progressed and I had children, etc she would pick away (over the phone as we never went there). The last Christmas she was here for she made a bog show of making the children opethe presents she had bought them before Christmas (knowing we didn't want them to). Shortly before here death (she had cancer and went downhill really quickly once she knew) she rang me to tell me she had written me out of her will (it's not any financial gain that got to me, it was the fact that even though she was so I'll she could still be so bloody hurtful). With hindsight, I probably should have told her what I thought of her years ago but now I will never know what would have happened.