Prostate Examination

[Philtaz]

10 signs your prostate exam isn't going well;

#10: Doctor: "Oops, there goes my watch again..."

#9: You look on the wall to find your doctor got his MD from the
University of Phoenix.

#8: While performing the exam, something bites your doctor's finger.

#7: Nurse: "I can't find the lube anywhere, doctor...I think we're out."

#6: Doctor: "Hmmm, I've never seen anything like that before."

#5: The doctor decides it would be funny to check your rectal acoustics
and finds them surprisingly resonant. (Hello...Hello...Hello...Hello)

#4: Doctor: "Hey Johnson, come here and feel this guy's prostate...It's
the size of a grapefruit!"

#3: The doctor tries to sell you cosmetic enhancements: electrolysis, anal
bleaching, laser hemorrhoid removal, etc.

#2: The doctor insists on not wearing rubber gloves because they ruin
the intimacy.

And the #1 sign your prostate exam is not going well:

Your doctor performs the final part of the exam with both hands firmly
placed on your shoulders.

[wildwood]

Oh dear! I think I'll cancel my appointment.