Why do men ask me if i've had previous relationships?

[ANHPAM]

when a man who wants to date me calls and asks me if I've had relationships since my divorce what's he getting at?

[karenmac60]

Maybe he's checking he's not going to be your 'rebound guy'.

[Sqad]

Christ, it's no big deal..........don't look for something that isn't there......it is just making conversation, you know like..." Nice day isn.t it?"........."how old are you?" ..."do you do a turn on your first date?"

Innocent questions.

[RATTER15]

Boxy, its not so easy to put a number on, if someone has been married for many years they have had fewer partners etc, so many variables to give numbers.

[Sharingan]

I think it's a horrible quesiton. I would never ask anyone that and I would never answer anyone who asked me. Why would anyone care and how is it any of their business?

[karenmac60]

But he didn't ask how many - only if she had had any. I'd be wary of being the first relationship after someone's divorce, and would be curious to know if they had been out with anyone since. The first one after a big break up isn't really destined to go well - too many hang ups from the marriage. And I would never have gone straight into a serious relationship straight after my ex and I split. I really think he's just fishing for an idea of how serious things are likely to get, and that could mean he either doesn't want anything too serious or he does and he doesn't want to be messed around by someone who is still getting over an ex husband.

[brenda]

I agree totally with Sharingan,a horrid question.If are not in a relationship with this man , and he is merely seeking an opportunity to go on a date with you, why the question?
What is he expecting you to say in response?
Or is he merely evaluating his own chances of getting his leg over , before you even go on a date.?
I would be very wary of a man who asked me such a question-- sounds a bit too controlling for my taste.
Best of luck.

[Joanne130]

If a man asked me that question in your situation I would think he was trying to find out if you were now available or not & how serious a prospect you think he is, wouldn't be offended by this question at all, would take it as him trying to ask in a roundabout way if you two had any prospects

[joko]

how many times has this happened? it sounds like a few from your post...which is odd - its none of his business

do you have a history with someone he knows?

i would suggest as others have said, to avoid him - if nothing else he is rude, and if he is questioning your past based on rumours and judging you, then probably not worth being with anyway

ratter - i have heard many blokes feel the way you do, but how do you think women feel thinking about all the girls their man has had?
works both ways and i have discussed this with mates before and it seems that when you break down that number into years etc its usually not very many at all

i knew a guy once years ago who was fuming to discover his girlfriend had had 10 blokes - to him 10 was loads - she was a total *** in his eyes and he was going to split up with her -
however, she was 30 and when i broke it down into how many over say, 14 years, it works out about one every 15 months... hardly the level of a streetwalker is it?...
if you work it out like that, even 20 is not a lot
nothing compared to some men

it is also 2012 and attitudes to sex are very different - having sex has nothing to do with morals any more - you can have very strong morals but still enjoy sex ...that is just an old fashioned prudish attitude of society that is thankfully dying out now.

not suggesting that women should go round having sex with anyone that moves, but any that choose to should not have their right to a boyfriend or husband or a family lessened or be treated badly - they are people like anyone else.

most girls 'reputations' rarely match the gossip anyway

[Dobi]

Won't you want to know the same about him?..

[naomi24]

Men call and ask you for a date - and ask about your previous relationships? How many men are we talking about here?

I've never been asked - but if a stranger did ask me, I'd think he was a weirdo, tell him to mind his own business - and hang up.

[cathfromsaron]

from experience, checking you are not an emotional wreck?

[Bambiagain]

Karenmac has a very good point. I met a gorgeous man shortly after he had split from his wife, but he was a total emotional wreck and it was destined never to be. I wished I had not been the first!