best or worst chat up lines............

[kick3m0n]

come on, confess.  What are the best (or worst) that you've used or heard used?

A bloke once said to me "Do you have mirrors on your trousers, cos I can definitely see myself in your pants."    I did laugh, thought it quite amusing at the time.

[Morrisonker]

I usually only get the usual 'fancy a drink?' but I did have one guy siddle up to my beside the bar and slur 'you have *goregous* breasts, wanna join me?' then he slide down to the ground.  Needless to say he didn't score with me :)

[bad11thebone]

 

Like Andy I never have used a chat up line think they are for desperate men, the best one I have heard is when a guy slipped a ring on his wedding finger went up to the girl and made sure she was aware that he was 'married' and said 'you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen' he then walked away and never made eye contact with her all night.  At the end of the night I left them inspecting each other tonsils, got to give the guy a lot of credit

[Sasha13]

Speaking as a single women, chat up lines do have a time and a place, if they make me laugh and show that a bloke is confident and perhaps a little bit too sure of himself - but then again, that's what I tend to go for in a man! If they come across as cheesy though I wouldn't go for it - that rules out most of the bad ones. The worse I've heard is... "I bet you a pound I can make your breasts move without touching them". When taken up on the bet, the man jiggles the women's breasts and then pays a pound. I'm afraid that loses him a quid and earns him a slap. Got to admit that if someone I liked the look of tried the one that andy hughes said with me I could go for it... especially if accompanied with a cheeky smile!!

[Litchick]

"Are your legs tired?  Because you've been running through my mind all day..."  UGH......

[toecrusher]

not exactly a chat up line this one, but id been dancing in a club all night with this bloke who seemed very nice and i quite fancied him, then he said, fancy going for a meal, so i said yes that would be lovely, he then led me to the hotdog stand in the car park!!! needless to say it didnt go any further.

[thikasabrik]

Years ago I was once chatting with a guy from Aberdeen and he said "Do you have any Scot in you?"Being Yorkshire born & bred I replied "No" and then he came out with the line

"Well would you like some?"

[Morrisonker]

thikasabrik - on behalf of my fellow aberdonian, I apologise for that terrible line, I can only hope he wasn't being entirely serious!

[londondave]

Man: If you want to come back to my place just say the word.

Woman: NO

Man: That's the word.

[Ducati]

I have a friend who looks like Plug from the Beano, but he is blessed with that indefinable 'something' that most of us just simply don't possess.

 

A few years ago, I witnessed him go up to a very attractive girl and, tongue very firmly planted in his cheek, said to her "do you want to take a naked trip to the love zone". He went home with her that night.

 

Had I tried it, I'd've been villified for being a sad pathetic loser - and deserved it! 

[JulieEve]

One that I have never forgotten - and have never heard since was:  "Do you make toast"

[amarillis]

I had a guy come up to me, took my hand and drew a line across my palm. He explained it was a big river and a little duck had to get from one side to the other, and asked me how the duck did it. At this point I was wondering what the hell the punchline was, but anyway I said the usual, like swim, fly, etc, all of which he replied 'no, that's not how he did it'. So in the end I asked him how the duck crossed the river, he said 'I don't know, I just wanted to hold your hand.'  Made me laugh at the time though!

[londondave]

When I was in my early 20s, a girl came up to me in a club and said "Hello. Where do you live?" I replied "Twickenham" Then she said "Would you like to give me a guided tour of Twickenham in the morning" (we got a cab straight home lol)

[OBonio]

Cup of tea? Married her 9 years later. Simple is best.

[GucciGal]

oh god, once this random guys says to me, your bum reminds me of an onion. I asked why, and he said cos every time I look at it it makes me wanna cry!!!

[kick3m0n]

Thanks guys!  Your answers gave me a good laugh this morning......xx

[Alixw]

A guy came up to me in a bar and said 'Excuse me, are you Jamaican?' being a white girl from Essex, i thought that was a bit strange, so i was like 'er......no, why?!' and he says 'cos you're Jamaican me crazy!!' I've never laughed so much!!

[lizzierose]

i once had " here's twenty pence, go ring your mum and tell her you're not coming home tonight"

which was appalling so i replied

"have it back so you can go and ring someone who cares"

not the best retort but at least he looked slightly less smug and arrogant

[Mistopheles]

lizzierose - brilliant!

Worst said to me: 'Your dress is lovely - would look better on my bedroom floor.' Groan.

Best one... don't think there is a good chat up line is there? Oh yes - someone once came up to me and said 'I've been watching you for ages and I just had to come and say hello because you're so beautiful I'd kick myself forever if I didn't talk to you.' Yes, I went for a drink with him. Probably says that to all the girls, but good for the ego or what!