Life's Never Dull Is It?

[Baldric]

Nipped out to Local Waitrose an hour or so back for a few bits and pieces, rounded the corner to the Fresh Produce counter to find a ZZ Top lookalike
'battering' the 12 year old (looking) Security Officer with a wet fish selected from the fish counter especially for that purpose by the look of it.
As the S/Officer was coming second, I took a firm grip on ZZ, placed his arm between his shoulder blades and asked him if he'd mind kneeling down facing the wall and crossing his legs behind him (it's a RM thing) as it's very
difficult to get up in a hurry from that position.
Police arrived about 5 mins later and I was greeted with "Hello Dave, I knew that would be you as soon as I saw your car outside, how's an old 'expletive deleted' like you manage to do that at your age?"
He then removed ZZ to the safety of the local nick, followed by me to give a statement.
The good news, A trolley load of Beer and Spirits as a freebee courtesy of the store manager, so not a bad day afterall.
;-)

[craft1948]

Good job you're not a muslim............

[rockyracoon]

Well done you, gonna share that beer and spirits?

[wolf63]

... but did you get what your wife sent you for or did the bad guy steal your note?

[Baldric]

Ok, come on down!

[penelope2]

I don't know your history Baldric, but well done.

[Psybbo]

Dave, our hero not a fearful Baldric at all

[tonyav]

Hey well done Baldric I'll have a lager !.

[Baldric]

Wee timerous beatie at heart sibs'
Can on the table for you tony!

[EcclesCake]

I'm snookered my local Waitrose is right beside RMAS.......they'll always be quicker of the mark than me!

You lucky bugger Baldric!

[Baldric]

^^beastie....not beatie.......doh!!

[wolf63]

Do you still have your arm in a sling after you were attacked by those ruthless killer hounds?

Off track - is making their ears stand up (cropping?) legal in the UK?

[Bazile]

Fancy getting your mate to do that , just so you could get some freebee's

[ck1]

What happened to the fish?

[Baldric]

Wolf, Sling's been off for a while now,
don't think it's legal, besides why would you want to?

Baz, shush! doing ok so far,
;o)

[Baldric]

ck1, sad to report it's had it's chips!

[hc4361]

Keep up with the times, baldric, for Evan's sake. That is not how things are done these days.

You should have video'd the face fish slapping on your mobile phone then uploaded it to Facebook. :D

Well done.

[wolf63]

I was hoping that it was illegal as it is cruel. Say hello to the pups.

[Baldric]

hc, one of the staff got it, so may well end up there!

[hc4361]

Yay!

[Baldric]

penelope2,
A largish chunk of my younger days as a Royal Marine.
It was an experience to remember.