Bowel Cancer Screening Kit

[Tilly2]

I received my kit this week but haven't yet started to collect my samples.
As it's awkward, pooing onto your hand, would it still be a true sample if you were to take a smear from the toilet paper instead?

[ethandron]

According to patient.co.uk, and health professionals I have recently had reason to speak to on this very subject, colonoscopy may well soon be brought in for bowel cancer screening...wouldn't that be great?
I've recently been diagnosed with crohns disease and ulcerative colitis, after spending a worrying few weeks thinking it was bowel cancer. I'm so very sorry retrocop and shaney, to hear of your troubles.

[ethandron]

Beg your pardon, it's a sigmoidoscopy they're considering, not a colonoscopy.

[Sqad]

I think that you may be confused.

Colonoscopy is being considered for screening, but it is non invasive....CT scan of the colon known as "virtual colonoscopy"

[boxtops]

Nah, you don't need THAT much paper, tilly! I'd find it more of a fag disposing of pooey bowls, it's bad enough disposing of the lolly stick :-)

[slaney]

Sorry to hear of your diagnosis retrocop, and very best of luck for the operation.

The bowel screening test presently does pick up cancer about 65% of the time - as has been said, not all cancers bleed and even if they do the blood loss can be intermittent.


However a trial done on a once only flexible sigmoidoscopy was promising..
http://www.cancerscreening.nhs.uk/bowel/flexible-sigmoidoscopy-screening-trial.html#
.. and as a result this procedure is to be rolled out in 6 centres
http://www.cancerscreening.nhs.uk/bowel/bowel-scope-screening.html

[Cloverjo]

Like retrocop, I wonder at the efficacy of the test. My mum did it, got a negative result, and a few months later the docs found a huge tumour in her bowel.

[Tilly2]

I think I'd rather poo into a little bowl than have a camera pushed up my backside. I'll do the test.

[jourdain2]

Very best wishes for the 29th retrocop.

[ubasses]

Trouble is Tilly, my test was all OK but I still ended up with the camera up the backside (sigmoidoscopy). Fortunately everything removed tested negative.

[MichaelZZ]

Did you hear about the bloke who couldn't tell poo from putty?



All his windows fell out.

[kloofnek]

Oh God...I hate doing it!!!
Had to do it three times this last month...the first was not clear,a little blood in it(could have been from my piles)...anyway ,did it again and result was clear but as they then had one clear and one not..wanted another set done to be sure..should hear from them Monday or Tuesday...I do hoe that is OK...a bit worried now.

[grasscarp]

What goes patter patter poo poo?
A mouse running along a hot pipe.

Visual joke as you give punch line blow on each hand to each "phoo" sound.

[Tilly2]

I can see that, grassy. Good one! :-)

Good luck for next week, kloof.

[kloofnek]

Thank you Tilly.

[grasscarp]

Let us know your result as we will be thinking of you and hoping for all clear.

[kloofnek]

Thank you,will do so..keep all your fingers crossed for me.

[kloofnek]

Just to let you know...got result today...it is clear...oh such a relief!!!

[Tilly2]

Sorry not to have responded sooner. That's excellent news, kloof. Good for you.

I'm all done and dusted. The envelopes on its way. Unpleasant, but a necessary evil.

[Tilly2]

envelope's. Flip!

[grasscarp]

Excellent news Kloofnek