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langara | 15:03 Sun 07th Jun 2015 | Family & Relationships
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My friends neighbours are driving her mad. She is a spinster in her 60's, with numerous health problems, her new neighbours have 3 small children who she has tried to get on with, but their parents seem to delight in upsetting her. She has done everything they have asked of her, including replacing fences, having scaffolding on her land so that they can paint house walls. Her main problem is the constant kicking of a football against the new fence, that she could ill afford to replace. A lot of her plants are getting broken with the ball keep coming into her garden, when she asked for some consideration, the mother said she was a muppet, when the little boy asked what a muppet was his mom said an old person who had nothing better to do than complain. I have no idea how to help her and most days she has tears when telling me the next episode. She is very frail and has crohns disease, so all the agro is not helping. Any suggestions would be a help. Thanks
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It sounds like it has gone past buying goal nets, which aren't that cheap. If the mother has called this lady a muppet in front of her children, not even the England's team goal net will smooth the waves.
12:02 Mon 08th Jun 2015
hiya, unless the fence was put up very very badly, it seems unlikely that kicking a foot ball against it would make it fall over, so tell her not to worry too much on that score
It would be the noise of the ball constantly hitting the fence that would drive me potty. The lady has my sympathy.
Can you or another friend not try to have a word with the neighbours and explain the situation?
If she goes to the council they can help. Its antisocial behaviour and there is redress.
Hearing a ball constantly banging on the back of our fence would drive us absolutely potty, without any other problems to worry about.
Poor old lady. Good advice from woofgang - try it.
They are children, children play.

I would turn the TV on and up.

Older people often harp back to the day when kids weren't sat in front of computers and now moan when kids play out.
Sounds like it is the mother who is a muppet. Disrespectful and a very bad role model for the children who will think they can just do what they like. Does she have any younger relatives who could speak up for her? Think it needs someone who will be very direct with the neighbour. There are anti-social teams in most cities but I'm not sure how effective they are.
Hands up those who stopped their kids playing outside in their own garden?
I had a similar problem about 2 years ago, had a word with the parents and the brats, but it carried on.

So after another week of the ball banging on the fence, and coming into my garden, I burst it with a knife, and threw it back, problem solved.
Your protests are a bit severe ummmm - the old lady only asked for some consideration - something most decent parents inculcate into their offspring.
Agree that children should be able to play in their own gardens ummmm, but when a neighbour's flowers and plants are getting broken and the fence is also in danger I would be having a word. Love seeing kids playing, in fact my own grandkids also play in my garden but there are rules. Still feel that from what langara has said that the mother and children are disrespectful.
These neighbour's are taking advantage of her good nature in complying with their demands.

Balls don't need to be kicked up against a fence. I would have never let my kids do this


Is there nobody that could have a word with them on your friend's behalf.
I would lI've to do it if I lived near. Hate morons like these. No Respect.
I doubt the kids are out playing 24/7.



Yes...but I also think that often posts like this are exaggerated.
Even one hour of football kicking against the fence is enough to want to blow your top, and hope the stupid woman next door would stop their kids from doing it.
I'd buy them a cheap goal net - children like to aim a ball - but really the parents should give this a bit more thought.


When my Mother died and we cleared the house, we found 12 footballs in the cellar - she had wearied of giving them back. :-)
I doubt very much that they ate exaggerated. We've got kids like that here. When I first moved on,ten years ago,there were children...but much better behaved than the current lot. Certain areas of the outer walls are being painted...and one group had taken to chalking every surface...the maintenance guy spent hours cleaning it,and he spoke to the parents. And it happened again. The same kids are out screaming from 9am to 10 pm...may as well be 24 hours. Yes..its great when they play,but not when it affects your own quality of life. We are all entitled to have peace and quiet,and to feel safe.
I would and have always thrown a ball back, but if it had caused me headaches, then its a no no too. Take kiddies to the local park for a good kickaround if theres one nearby.
I really can relate to your friends sufferance, as I have similar neighbourhood children, once they return from school, then the constant banging against the fence begins, so I have to scoot inside for some peace. Times have changed, respect for the aged seems to be waning.

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