Friends?

[spathiphyllum]

So friend 1 is going away forever.. they invite a number of friends

Only two show up with their other half's (not part of the friends list, simply plus ones) making 4. Considering everyone was aware of the leaving "party", most said they would go but just didn't turn up or respond to messages...


What message would that send to you personally? You may never see them again for your entire life, but that last sentiment meant what?

[Baldric]

Who cares ??

[Buenchico]

With Skype and email, 'going away for ever' probably isn't seen in the same way that it might have been in the past. Missing out on someone's 'going away party' won't seem to matter to many people when they know that they'll still be keeping in touch regularly via the internet anyway.

[spathiphyllum]

It seemd to matter to the friend going away... Those who didn't arrive (they were expected) used 'excuses' such as, i saw him yesterday etc.. but friend 1 really wanted the night out vibe, which he was exspecting from RSVPs but never got. I would be upset.. Skype and txt isn't the same as seeing someone often in my experience and opinion. I guess it comes down to the individual friendships with friend 1.. I felt bad for him.

[jno]

they're not such great friends, then. Turning up to say goodbye is a pretty minimal show of interest

[Tilly2]

The message it gives is that it's probably a good thing you are going away. Perhaps you will find some proper friends in your new situation.

[spathiphyllum]

This has gone oddly.. I suspect i owe you an apology?

[rowanwitch]

Happened to me when I left London, leaving do, whole office invited me ended up just me and my boss who I'd only invited out of courtesy... it hurts when it happens.

[nailit]

if it were me I'd be a bit miffed about it Spath, sometimes people aint the friends that you thought they were...

[spathiphyllum]

Tilly i'm not goign away, but if i was that is how i would have felt personally... But i've always been a bit 'sensitive' for my gender which i wont state because that is specific.

[spathiphyllum]

Nailit exactly.. I am a person who stands by the saying "action speak louder than words".. I rarely spoke to friend 1, but after my actions of going to his events, offering him for coffee etc.. making the real action he looked me in the eye last weekend and said i really appreciate you coming, if no one turned up i'd probably be in tears at the bar alone.

It hit me a bit.. My friends are suppose to be closer to friend 1.. it makes me thing what if it was I that was going?

[spathiphyllum]

I think everyone assumed everyone would go, so everyone thought they could get away with not going :/ When i informed the rest of the fact it was just friend 1 and us 4 that arrived they were all a bit surprised.

[kvalidir]

I can count my real friends on the fingers of two hands I think, and I think that's actually true of everyone, but we frequently over estimate our own popularity and how low that figures in others. It says more about the horrible half arsed specimens they are than your friend, who deserved better. Nasty behaviour.

[Baldric]

for whatever reason my answer was removed, your OP suggested my response was appropriate, I would say a fond farewell but I cannot be responsible for others actions, so be it.

[spathiphyllum]

Thats dread rowan i’m sorry about that

[spathiphyllum]

Kval i can count mine with 2 fingers not includin the Ms

[spathiphyllum]

Yes baldric i agree i see that now there was some miscommunication tion

[nailit]

Friends, like spouses or work collegues, sometimes arnt the people that you thought they were...humans are funny creatures.