ChatterBank1 min ago
Coroners
42 Answers
I have been recently bereaved. As the death was unexpected and the cause is unknown, a police investigation is ongoing. The PM has not given any answers so far, but several complete organ and various significant other body parts have been retained for further investigations. The police inform me that these further investigations might well take a year or more.
An interim death certificate has been issued, which would allow a funeral. There are 3 choices
1) go ahead with a funeral now, and let the police/coroner deal with the retained parts when they have cmpleted the investigation (hospital incineration) 2) go ahead with a funeral now, then ask the funeral director to deal with the retained part when the investigations are complete 3) wait till the investigations are completed and then repatriate all the parts and have a funeral.
My head is swimming and emotions are overwhelming me regarding these horrible choices on top of the grief i feel i'm drowning in. Ha anyone been in this situation, and can offer me words of guidance/reassurance? How do the mechanics work if i went with choice 2 but the funeral was a burial? Lastly, can you just go and talk to funeral directors to ask for advice even if you don't retain their service or their services might not be needed for a year?
An interim death certificate has been issued, which would allow a funeral. There are 3 choices
1) go ahead with a funeral now, and let the police/coroner deal with the retained parts when they have cmpleted the investigation (hospital incineration) 2) go ahead with a funeral now, then ask the funeral director to deal with the retained part when the investigations are complete 3) wait till the investigations are completed and then repatriate all the parts and have a funeral.
My head is swimming and emotions are overwhelming me regarding these horrible choices on top of the grief i feel i'm drowning in. Ha anyone been in this situation, and can offer me words of guidance/reassurance? How do the mechanics work if i went with choice 2 but the funeral was a burial? Lastly, can you just go and talk to funeral directors to ask for advice even if you don't retain their service or their services might not be needed for a year?
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.bednobs, please accept my condolences. I cannot imagine how the delay in being able to complete the funeral arrangements compounds your grief. I would suggest you contact a funeral director and ask them direct. I know that our family funeral director would advise us without charge but cannot speak for all. I am sure they will deal with your enquiries sensitively and helpfully.
I would ring a funeral director and ask the question you’ve just asked here, about advice. They are very sensitive and will be as helpful as they can.
Personally, I would have the funeral now as I would feel a bit in limbo having to wait an unknown length of time, and allow the retained parts to be disposed of by the authorities in due course.
But that’s just my personal view.
I’m so very sorry for this situation you are in bednobs, and the overwhelming sadness you’re feeling, I wish I could offer words of comfort but I don’t think anything I say would make a difference. You’re in my thoughts x
Personally, I would have the funeral now as I would feel a bit in limbo having to wait an unknown length of time, and allow the retained parts to be disposed of by the authorities in due course.
But that’s just my personal view.
I’m so very sorry for this situation you are in bednobs, and the overwhelming sadness you’re feeling, I wish I could offer words of comfort but I don’t think anything I say would make a difference. You’re in my thoughts x
Bedknobs what an awful situation for you. I am so sorry. Its a personal thing and you must decide what feels right to you but someone close to me was in this position and elected for option 1. Please don't take this the wrong way, and it may be different for you, but options 2 and 3 were going to cost considerably more and for my friend this was a consideration. The funeral director that they spoke to was extremely tactful and sympathetic.
Bednobs, I am so very sorry for your loss. The advice you've been given about speaking to a funeral director is good. When I was in a similar but less traumatic situation with an unexplained death that shouldn't have happened I also found that speaking to the Coroner's office was very helpful. They were very kind by keeping in touch with me during the waiting period.
My thoughts are with you.... but as to when to have the funeral? I'm sorry I can't answer as I have never had to make such a heartbreaking decision.....Gx
My thoughts are with you.... but as to when to have the funeral? I'm sorry I can't answer as I have never had to make such a heartbreaking decision.....Gx